Notes Archive

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Terry Newland

+ BBQ After trail (Bring a can)

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Hawley Common

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Old Guildford Road

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Puttenham (Post Code GU3 1BE)

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Bourley Road

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Puttenham (Post Code GU3 1BE)

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NOTES ON DH3 RUN 299 ON WEDNESDAY 9^th SEPTEMBER 2009
FROM PUTTENHAM (GR: 919462)

Hare:  ‘Flash’ Gordon (Cruise Control).

Hounds: Sarah Nagel (Petal), Derek Gray (Prime8), Les Salmon (over Ready), Tony Soane (Sony Tone), Alan Jewell (Easy Rider), Brian Langford (Cyclone), Chris Farmer (Bidet), Tony Case (Fruit & Nut), Richard McAllister (Mountain Rescue), Kim Dyos (Little Prick), James Roberts (No Entry), Kath Bradshaw (Twin Peaks) and Sue Figgis (Centre of Attraction).

 It should have been bright and sunny but was instead dull and damp – almost proper rain but not quite.  After a short, pithy brief we were off to complaints from some Hounds that the Hare normally gave an indication of direction to get the pack going.  So, being forever helpful, Cruise Control told one of the directions in which it was not.  Inevitably, the pack got spread out and after a while one (unknown) Hound was lucky enough to find the on and F&N’s horn confirmed it.  So we were off.  Downhill for a while and then a while more. Along well worn paths through high bracken to another car park where we found the first regroup and it was here that CofA deigned to join us (late, as ever).  Now the Hare had us spreading out all over the place in confusion.  A number of tracks had been marked but all seemed to end in a falsie.  Then the horn was heard again and we were off once more. The pace was quite fast because No Entry was at the front and brought his North Hants habits with him.  The rest struggled on and it was soon apparent that the trail was turning back on itself. Sony Tone called out a warning to the short cutting MR that saved him from getting considerably shigged up – a pity thought some; it could have been such a giggle.  However, the next regroup gathered all together, eventually.  On starting off again there was some delay and confusion as the search for the real trail went on.  In due course the true intent of the Hare was discovered and the trail went off over a minor road and continued through the woods once more.  Around a lake or two, past a couple of houses, around another lake on a long straight to another regroup. Now it was time for No Entry to resume his front running and that took him up a falsie with MR close on his tail.  It was F&N’s horn that once more called us on and we found ourselves going back in on the outward trail (how about that for economy of flour and effort!). Timing was exact in that we were back on the hour but we had to pay for all the downhill stretches by struggling back up to the car park where down downs were awarded.  First to the Hare for a very good trail but he had to help himself to the beer because the RA is getting forgetful in his dotage for he didn’t make the offer before starting to sing.  Then Petal and Centre of Attraction collected theirs for being remarkable lassies, Little Prick and No Entry for returning after a break in attendance, while Cyclone got one for being a Master Trainer and showing his newly gained doglet how to Hash.  The On Inn was the Harvester where some very reasonably priced ale was consumed.

Don’t forget that the next meet is the 300^th with a trail laid by Easy Rider and starting at the Wellington Statue.

Hope to see you there…

NOTES ON DH3 RUN 298 ON WEDNESDAY 26^th AUGUST 2009
FROM QUETTA PARK (GR 817512)

Hares:  Sarah Nagel (Petal) and Steve Nagel (Silvier Fox).

Hounds: Derek Gray (Prime8), Les Salmon (over Ready), Tony Soane (Sony Tone), Paul Armstrong (Back Up), Geoff Cooke (Free Ryde), Alan Jewell (Easy Rider), Brian Langford (Cyclone), Chris Farmer (Bidet), Neil Warren (Armoured Farmer), Tony Case (Fruit & Nut), Richard McAllister (Mountain Rescue), Andy Hocking (Sugar Plum Fairy), Kim Dyos (Little Prick), John Elder (Seis Matters), Alan Fiddler (Outrider), ‘Flash’ Gordon (Cruise Control), Tom Gordon (Hot to Trot), Ron Peasley (Hi Hat), and Mark Simmons (Any One Will Do).

This report is going to be short for reasons that will become apparent. The start was late for no obvious reason, and slow because it was uphill and there seemed to be a reluctance to take the lead too far ahead.  From the car park we went up the slope towards the quarters where there was a lengthy pause.  For a while the pack wandered around and eventually found the trail leading, as anticipated, into the woods.  Sadly, after a further delay, Mountain Rescue found himself at the front but following what turned out to be a false trail.  Seis Matters had found another way round and we met for a moment but went off in many different directions.  After what seemed an age, the call was heard.  But now your scribe found himself in thick undergrowth and by the time he’d sorted himself out, the pack was well beyond hearing.  So, one his own he had a choice and totally screwed up by going the wrong way.  He was on his own… The loneliness of the long-lost scribe began…

Meanwhile, the pack obviously made good progress and failed to note the absence of you-know-who at the first regroup.  At the second he was missed but Bidet announced it was not a problem as the miscreant was probably just eating blackberries (he was but as he was on his own he didn’t think it would matter and the pack wasn’t going to wait anyway). Some time later, using a natural, inbuilt and highly honed lethargic idleness and taking a short cut, the pack came into view and was advised not to proceed up the hill down which the lost one was descending – there was no trail there.  Much searching later, it was our newcomer, Any One Will Do, who picked up the homeward trail and we all arrived home together – how nice.

Down Downs to the ‘Greatest’ Hares for laying an excellent trail despite the weather, to Sugar Plum Fairy for, despite being the North Hants RA, still needing more experience in his duties and to Tom Gordon who was renamed Hot to Trot because of his enthusiasm and speed on trail.  Any One Will Do got his because he was new to Hashing, and Little Prick and the Field Marshal (Bidet) got theirs for being great pretenders. Being a trail finder got Easy Rider his and Armoured Farmer collected one for (something about ) being ‘One-eyed Riley’.  The On Inn was once again The Tumbledown where conviviality was the order of the evening.

On On On ‘til next time…

NOTES ON DH3 RUN 297 ON WEDNESDAY 12^th AUGUST 2009
FROM THE RLC DEEPCUT SPORTS GROUNDS (GR; 919582)

Hares:  Lt Col Paul Duncan (Old Grouser), Robyn Duncan (A-Tipple)

Hounds: Derek Gray (Prime8), Sue Figgis (Centre of Attraction), Sarah Nagel (Petal), Les Salmon (over Ready), Tony Soane (Sony Tone), Paul Armstrong (Back Up), Geoff Cooke (Free Ryde), Claire Brewer (One Way Only), Cath Bradshaw (Twin Peaks), Sharon Harvey (Olympic Feet), Alan Jewell (Easy Rider), Brian Langford (Cyclone), Chris Farmer (Bidet), Neil Warren (Armoured Farmer), Tony Case (Fruit & Nut)

Apologies:  Lt Col Clem Maginnis (Hard Hat Harry), Richard McAllister (Mountain Rescue)

With the Grand Master and A-Tipple haring and having organised pleasant weather a good pack was fielded, ‘tho’ a few stars were absent – Park and Ride where are you?

Old Grouser briefed us, and we were off checking in all directions; Bidet thinking he knew the favoured area of the Hares swung left, but the ‘on’-call came from Fruit & Nut straight over the sports grounds, to centre and to left and lost! – until a call from ahead right from  Free Ryde who had covered the entire sports fields to find the trail into the light woods; One Way Only and Petal Keenly leading us ‘on’ only to hit a check-back that took us ‘round the woods-edge again for a good jaunt to the road of the ‘eastern’ quarters.

We headed back towards the woodland again, Bidet to the fore, probably anticipating entry into the ‘paint-ball’ area.  A check again by the woods and Prime8 knowing the region called us up the foresters back and bearing on-left into a trail through pleasant woodland, leaping the odd roots and logs that Armoured Farmer enjoyed (a bit like the old mine fields?).  A couple of checks kept the pack together and Back Up, Sony Tone and Free Ryde busy going for the options, while Bidet took Fruit & Nut to task over failure to ‘Kick-Out’ the checks – just as Centre of Attraction caught up with us, as ever having given us a 5 minute ‘start’!

Co Hare, A-Tipple, gave a nod to Olympic Feet who led us out on-track to the edge of the ‘Paint-Ball’ area, we swung back though the old ‘Mini-Range – open area, and being well orientated Easy Rider and Cyclone opened up into dense undergrowth and then lead us up a very (!) challenging hill – up, up, up and up, Twin Peaks was in her element!

What goes up must come down, and we then descended to the check where Every Ready called us ‘on’, we headed west on more enjoyable tracks; A-Tipple suggested some might take her doggy ‘on’ a short-cut for ‘home’, however all carried on regardless hitting a boundary track and a check where they cut hard-left for the ‘On-In’ through Old Grousers, previously mentioned, favoured area.

The Hash Circle formed-up declaring the Hare’s trail remarkable and fun! – they being dually awarded ‘Down-Downs’.  ‘Down-Downs’ were also awarded to Petal and One Way Only for racing, why not; Prime8 and Centre of Attraction for outrunning the pack; Bidet and Cyclone for innovation.  And the pack went ‘on’ to our old haunt in ‘The Pine Ridge’ (And excellent chips:  Grade ‘8’).

On On ‘til next time

NOTES ON DH3 RUN 296 ON WEDNESDAY 29th JULY 2009
FROM LIGHTWATER COUNTRY PARK (GR: 902618)

Hares:  Kath Bradshaw (Twin Peaks) and Tony Soane (Sony Tone).

 Hounds: Richard McAllister (Mountain Rescue), Chris Farmer (Bidet), Sarah Nagel (Petal), Steve Nagel (Silvier Fox), Derrick Gray (Prime8), Alan Jewell (Easy Rider), Rick Rawcliffe (Giant Haystack),
Alex Rawcliffe (No name yet) and Yvonne Davies (Tite Thing).

Thankfully, the weather forecasters got it wrong and we were spared the anticipated downpour.  Fewer Hounds than for a long time but it was not the quantity…the quality was there ready to enjoy a good trail.  And good it was. Four regroups we were told, a couple of main roads and that was about all the briefing contained.  Into the woods plunged our habitual front runner as Silvier led us to the left (north for the navigators) and down, down, down. Silvier didn’t realise the change of direction until too late by which time Mountain Rescue saw him returning up the last bit of the hill.  The upward trend now took over because we could not get much lower (and that’s saying something).  It was not long before Silvier was at the front again, only to go off in the wrong direction and that left MR where he didn’t really want to be.  The trail was interesting; it undulated a little at this stage and meandered through the trees. Tite Thing was displaying her previous Hashing know-how and Alex keeping up with her well (she was to pay for this later). Bidet was castigated for ignoring MR’s efforts at the front and claiming that Silvier had led the whole way so far. Now we passed through close countryside that most of us did not recognise and that made for greater interest.  MR, at the front again (bold print for Bidet’s sake) led the pack astray by declaring a bar across the path – in fact it was not a bar but a puddle reflecting the light to make it look like a bar – a point not missed by Prime8 who gleefully pointed out the error.  Over the motorway bridge we went for a regroup and short-lived respite.  Prime8 and Giant Haystack were quietly told of a short cut but the rest chased off after Silvier once more. Just when we thought there was no more uphill, we started to gain still more altitude until we reached the viewing point.  No time for appreciating the sights, we were off along the crest of the ridge.  Easy Rider pounded along chasing the front runners and trying to persuade Alex to slow down a bit – all to no avail.  At the next regroup Sony Tone indicated that the unchecked path may be worth checking and it was.  That brought the front runners back to heel for a while.  It was the sight of Petal galloping off through the woods that got the errant MR back on track (he diverted for a moment but found a trail apparently  going downhill so, very foolishly, went down to the bottom (and this despite Sony’s hint that the remainder of the trail was on the level).  So, after just an hour, everyone got back in good heart to find an exhausted Alex who did recover after a drink or two and a bowlful of cheesy chips. The Pine Ridge Golf Club provided its usual valued hospitality, but without Bidet who had no trousers and was not allowed inside in shorts The great joy was that, with the RA away, there was no wasting time in verbal ramblings and we were at the beer in next to no time without a down down in sight or hearing.

NOTES ON DH3 RUN 295 ON WEDNESDAY 15th JULY 2009
FROM RUSHMORE ARENA (GR: 850518)

Hare:  Richard McAllister (Mountain Rescue)

Hounds: Tony Case (Fruit’n’Nut), Tony Soane (Sony Tone), Chris Farmer (Bidet), Sarah Nagel (Petal), Ron Peasley (Hi Hat), Vance Allen (Silver Jumper), Paul Armstrong (Back Up), Paul Duncan (Old Grouser), John Elder (Seis Matters), Alan Fiddler (Outrider), Derrick Gray (Prime8), Sharon Harvey (Olympic Feat), Clem Maginniss (Hard Hat Harry), Ian Warren (Fly By) and Neil Warren (Armoured Farmer).

The Hare’s brief was brief and included a warning for front runners to ‘observe carefully’ – words of wisdom they ignored and immediately shot off on the wrong track.  The next batch picked up their error but then made one of their own.  It was Petal and Primate8 who picked up the trail that had sneakily moved back left.  With the pack now on course the front runners were now under control for at least 200 yards when the trail quite clearly went right, but they didn’t.  Only Prime8 (who had been quickly overtaken) and Hi Hat (who was dawdling as usual) took the correct route only to join the rest of the pack who were doing very little about checking for the trail.  Castigated by Bidet, they did not stir.  Fly By was off in the right direction but overshot; Bidet was off in the wrong direction and found the ‘falsie’ – but at least he tried.  Now Seis and Fly By found the trail and were off like the proverbial but both failed to spot the change of direction.  Petal picked it up and crossed the ‘nallah’ with Fruit’n’Nut in hot pursuit.  Once out of the trees and into the open, there was a burnt out car wreck to inspect and that definitely took precedence over checking for the trail. Fruit’n’Nut (F&N) was off the wrong way as was Back Up who thought he was on and called back Seis who so nearly picked up the real trail.  More wrong checks before Seis once more checked out and found he was on. Through the trees with Olympic Feat showing the way, out into the open and back into more trees and finally into the open once more for a regroup.  We waited for F&N. And waited.  We called several times.  And waited. Eventually we set off on the trail again and soon there were hounds all over the place – apart from F&N who was still missing, presumed lost. A Hare Hint got people moving in almost the right direction but it was Prime8 who got there first.  A kicked out blob caused momentary panic but Fly By was not fooled for long.  Back into the trees we went and along a path by familiar territory.  Up and over the road towards Caesar’s Camp to the next regroup.  By now we were missing F&N (still) and Bidet who had started to pull a calf muscle and made straight for home. Seis and Fly By still took the lead with Silver Jumper and Sony Tone joining them. Outrider was running with surprising speed over the hilly bit and soon we found ourselves at the only bit of shig en route. Some swine had removed the ‘bridge’ so there was some mud that attached itself to the unsuspecting and foolish.  Primate8, having done the gentlemanly thing by helping Petal over, promptly slipped and sat down in the mud. By now the pack was well strung out with Sony Tone and Fly By taking the low road instead of keeping straight on into the woods once more.   Through more sun-speckled trees to a point going uphill away from home.  Now, that was what caused some consternation.  At the top there was a small, open plain and perhaps the most difficult to find way out.  Olympic found it and called all on.  Down through some pretty rough ground went we with some leaving the marked trail and trying to find their own way out.  The third and last regroup was ignored by Olympic and Outrider as they found their way back over the road.  Nearly home, we came across the non-running  Old Grouser and Dennis who had just witnessed a yellow shirt running across a road junction – was it the errant F&N?  For the last bit, the trail went through some more very close country and wended its way back to the car park.  Yes, the yellow shirt had been occupied by F&N!  Down Downs went to: the Hare, to returnees Seis Matters and Olympic Feat, to ‘guiders’ Bidet and Armoured Farmer, to Petal for turning up at the right time to prevent a pack of unlucky 13, while the two GMs, Hard Hat Harry and Old Grouser got theirs for taking ‘intelligent lines’…???

On On

NOTES ON DH3 RUN 293 ON WEDNESDAY 17th JUNE 2009
FROM HAWLEY LAKE CP (GR: 840579)

Hares:  Claire Brewer (One Way Only) and Tony Soane (Sony Tone) in support.

Hounds: Brian Langford (Cyclone), Vance Allen (Silver Jumper), Richard McAllister (Mountain Rescue), Alan Jewell (Easy Rider), Clem Maginniss (Hard Hat Harry), Chris Farmer (Bidet), Kim Dyos(Little Prick), Terry Newland (Rainbow Man), Kath Bradshaw (Twin Peaks), Ian Lowers (City Slicker), Sue Figgis (Centre of Attraction),‘Wally’ and, eventually, Tony Case (Fruit’n’Nut).

Some of us assembled. We waited. More came. We waited. The clouds gave forth some of their rain.  We waited.  Centre of Attraction arrived with five minutes to spare.  We still waited – and for what?  The RA to arrive.  And arrive he did not so off we went without him.  ‘Wally’, a newcomer to Deepcut Hash and from some ‘foreign’ Hash, was off, living up to his name and full of enthusiasm as he towed his little pooch into the distance.  The rest waited to see if he was on.  In the distance a long way up the road we could see this figure gesticulating with a strange arm movements – this quickly copied by little Prick and became known as ‘Wally’s ballet’. He disappeared into the jungle to the right only to reappear quite quickly.  Then it was forward up the road from which he soon returned.  Then he was off to the left while the rest gathered to watch his energetic performance.  Meanwhile, Centre of Attraction went off right and soon found the trail. It was Bidet who called on the pack.  Beside the lake we went for a while with Wally now back in the lead but not realising that Little Prick had picked up the trail further on.  At the first regroup she was accused of being an SCB (as though there was anything wrong with that – and she followed the trail without crossing a bar).  It was here that the late Cyclone caught up with us and it was announced that the slow-moving normal FRB Silver Jumper was, in fact, really suffering from injury (stretched ligaments after playing rounders). Not a lot of sympathy. Off again through the woods in a gentle uphill trot.  Wally had gone off and was seen in the distance gesticulating once more, arms flailing through the air like a lunatic (hence the name?).  Now Bidet indicated that had ‘heard’ the trail went to the trig point. As Mountain Rescue was well on his way there anyway, he ignored Wally and went up to the top of hill to the sound of rifle and automatic fire, where there was flour leading right up to the point and regroup. “Come on you lazy long-legged lolloping layabouts,” (or something like that) alliterated Bidet.  On they came, but still no sign of the RA.  Now here’s a strange thing. Easy Rider took over the lead and kept it up for quite a while.  Right up to the wired compound he led us.  Having been warned to avoid the area, we did just that but still with Easy Rider in the lead as more rifle fire was heard.  Then there was a bit of a pause and we could see the car park not so far away.  BUT, and there’s often a ‘but’, the trail took us in exactly the opposite direction.  However, at he final check after various displays imitating Wally’s ballet (or rather adding to the repertoire) the pack was soon on its way In.  Five minutes after the arrival of the last of the pack, Fruit’n’Nut turned up explaining that (he hadn’t been lost but…) he managed to lock himself out of his car.  Now the good point of this was that he had not a clue as to what had gone on during the run so was not allowed to have any down downs.  The Crown and Cushion offered a far better alternative and it was there that we enjoyed their beer and hospitality and quite a lot of jollity, too.  So, thank you One Way for a good trail and ‘til next time, ON ON…

NOTES ON DH3 RUN 291 ON WEDNESDAY 20th MAY 2009
FROM OFFICERS MESS CAR PARK

Hares:  Vance Allen (Silver Jumper)

Hounds:  Ian Lowers (City Slicker), Tony Case (Fruit’n’Nut), Tony Soane (Sony Tone), Richard McAllister (Mountain Rescue), Alan Jewell (Easy Rider), Ron Peasley (Hi Hat), Clem Maginniss (Hard Hat Harry), Sarah Nagel (Petal), Steven Nagel (Silvier Fox), Chris Farmer (Bidet), Karen Allen (Designer), Clare Brewer (One Way Only), John Elder (Seis Matters), Alex Lamb (Soggy Gusset), Zoë McAllister (Kanchi) and Ian Warren (Fly By).

“It’s just about 500metres in that direction.” That, accompanied by a detailed account of how many checks, how many regroups, how many back backs, how many hills up, how many hills down was the Hare’s brief.  So, over in that direction we went; and went, and went…it seemed interminable.  With Silvier to his usual position at the front, closely followed by Fly By and Soggy Gusset (accompanied by Gaji Maji), the rest of us followed at a slower, more sedate rate.  Being well strung out across the field at the back of the Mess, it gave time for the back markers to get warmed up ready for the ‘two up and two down’ hills.  There was, of course, more in the way of gradients but the Hare was really talking about ‘Heartbreak Hill’ and its neighbour.  The trail now turned back towards the road but it was Sony Tone who now found the trail leading up the incline to the Barracks’ sports field. A regroup and a back back kept the pack together as we went around the sports ground and through the trees (that is between the trees, not actually through them).  It must have been about here when the two mad checkers converged at high speed to join us on the true trail, Fly By almost in control but Soggy calling out “Coming through!” as he hurtled down the hill out of control with Gaji at full tilt narrowly missing Petal and the gentle joggers below.  And on to Heartbreak – with an enormous arrow encouraging ascent and Sony leading the way. Well, we made it and the expression on Hi Hat’s face spoke volumes about his opinion of that bit of the course.  At the top was another, this time much needed, regroup.  From the top we descended (for there was no further rise at this point). Down to the road we continued and off towards the camp only to turn and descend still further to the canal over which we crossed.  Back along the towpath to the next canal bridge over which we crossed back to a hill up which we went – slowly at the back. By this stage Designer and One Way Only were chattering as though to save the world.  Fruit’n’Nut was wondering when he could blow his horn, Kanchi was wandering along enjoying the warmth and fresh air, Bidet tapping out his stride with his walking sticks and even Hard Hat was slower this time. The trail followed up through the woods as we passed by exercising soldiers enjoying the sunshine and on to a long, long straightish run home.  There was a consensus and it was that the trail was actually quite good…and that is praise indeed.  Down downs went to the Hare for his good trail, to the Hilly Ones in the form of Seis Matters and City Slicker who followed all the hills up and down and to the ‘Posh Spice Girls’, Designer and One Way Only.  Silvier and Mountain Rescue got theirs for being ‘dedicated’ and Easy Rider for setting the example.  The On Inn was the Pineridge Golf Club where the first chips were graded 7 but the second lot were a high 8.

NOTES ON DH3 RUN 290 ON WEDNESDAY 6th MAY 2009
FROM PIRBRIGHT ROAD CAR PARK (GR: 923562)

Hares:  Ian Lowers (City Slicker) and Tony Case (Fruit’n’Nut)

Hounds:  Tony Soane (Sony Tone), Richard McAllister (Mountain Rescue), Alan Jewell (Easy Rider), Sue Figgis (Centre of Attraction), Derrick Gray (Prime8), Ron Peasley (Hi Hat), Clem Maginniss (Hard Hat Harry), Vance Allen (Silver Jumper), Kath Bradshaw (Twin Peaks), Sarah Nagel (Petal), Steven Nagel (Silvier Fox), Les Salmon (Ever Ready), Geoff Cook (Free Ryde), Chris Farmer (Bidet), Paul Gallagher (spring Lamb), Kim Dyos (Little Prick) and Neil Warren (Armoured Farmer).

Bragging about the glorious Hash Weather, Fruit’n’Nut claimed it was he who fixed it – we know differently.  City Slicker was a bit vague with his direction of start but his co-hare put us right and Silvier was off like the proverbial for a couple of hundred yards and then Free Ryde shot off into the wide open with Sky Hi on the correct path.  Silvier won in the end and soon led us all from the most revolting, smelly, obnoxious mire into which Twin Peaks deposited herself for no real good reason.  Once the pong had subsided the front runners were well away continuing around ‘the loop’ with a late arriving Hard Hat cutting across to catch up.  Into the woods from the open ground went we, to the first regroup.  Mountain Rescue was off piste but managed to save Sony Tone from checking along the wrong way but then they both had to catch up before joining, well, nearly joining, the main pack at another regroup over the main road on the normal Tunnel Hill car park.  Now the pack was at a point of indecision and it was a while before Sky Hi realised that we really were going down under the rail bridge.  Bidet reckoned that MR would know where to go but he was wrong and Sony Tone picked up the lead.  Passing through territory well known to some, others were not quite sure but it was Silvier and Sky Hi who led the pack over the cycle bridges and seesaws only to find they weren’t the first at the next regroup.  Now we crossed the road and ran down to another rail bridge for another regroup where there was considerable discussion on the various options open.  As ever, only one was right (and it was right), and right to the main road, under the rail bridge (not the same rail bridge as before, but the next one along) with Free Ryde taking up the challenge of front running.  Instead of turning left and going straight back to the car park, it was right and over the road back into the woods (this is included so that Silvier, Bidet and Prime8 will learn where the true trail went).  Through the tree and a final left back up to the car park and we were home.  Short, but very sweet and most enjoyable.  Then came the down downs; first for the principal hare, then for Free Ryde on his return after a lengthy break, followed by our ‘holiday makers’ Silvier and Bidet. Armoured Farmer got his for wearing a hat in the circle and Hard Hat Harry for drinking healthily all the way round.  Our health freak, Easy Rider got his for going to the gym before the run - again.  It was only afterwards that witnesses proffered the fact that Hard Hat was seen doing press-ups after the run (obviously he didn’t run hard enough).  Then it was to the White Hart in Pirbright for libation and jolly jesting (and at one stage even some serious discussion).

Try not to weaken…On On

NOTES ON DH3 RUN 289 ON WEDNESDAY 22^nd APRIL 2009
FROM RLC MUSEUM CAR PARK (GR: 906577)

Hare:  Tony Soane (Sony Tone),

Hounds:  Richard McAllister (Mountain Rescue), Tony Case (Fruit’n’Nut), Alan Jewell (Easy Rider), Sue Figgis (Centre of Attraction), Derrick Gray (Prime8), Ron Peasley (Hi Hat), Clem Maginniss (Hard Hat Harry), Vance Allen (Silver Jumper), Kath Bradshaw (Twin Peaks), Ian Angel (Hippo), Sarah Nagel (Petal), Steven Nagel (Silvier Fox), Terry Newland (Rainbow Man), Les Salmon (Ever Ready), Clare Brewer (One Way Only), Mette Sorensen (Leg Over) and Karen Allen (Designer)

Absolutely ideal weather for Hashing and an excellent trail through the jungles of Deepcut.  Over the road it started (and finished) with the front-runners leading the pack astray right from the start.  Brought back to the real trail the lead was taken by Hard Hat, or Sky Hi or Silvier with occasional mistaken ventures by TVRFRB*.  There were to be five regroups, we were told and numerous loops to afford ready short cuts for the idle or injured.  The only declared ‘injured’ was Rainbow Man making a recovery from a knee operation, then another in the form of Hippo who is fast heading for a similar operation.  The well-laid trail was easy to follow if you had your wits about you (and there were a few of those about) or had the eyes of an eagle.  As so often happens, half way round and we came across Centre of Attraction waiting patiently for us to catch up after one of those loops fooled us all (Except CofA who claimed to have followed the trail from the previous regroup).  The trail undulated well and changed direction, thus splitting the pack.  Now, once again, TVRFRB, while diligently checking out a lost trail found himself near the top of the rise when it became apparent that the pack, most of them, had found the trail back down in the dip.  Being ever-reluctant to lose this hard gained altitude, he became detached from the pack so knows not what occurred with the main body.  Sky Hi was within sight and calling the pack on and that was the last seen of anyone until very close to home.  But all eventually arrived back safe and reasonably sound for the down downs.  The Hare was first followed by our new harriette, Karen Allen who was promptly named “Designer” (not sure quite why but the RA dribbled on and lost us all).  The return of Rainbow Man after his operation was welcomed as being fitter than ever, while Hippo got his for blowing his trumpet as we sang to the ‘racketeer’, and easy Rider and Silvier for fanatical fitness.  Thirst was quenched in the Pinehurst Golf Club with first class chips provided by the Hare.

On On

NOTES ON DH3 RUN 286 ON WEDNESDAY 11^th MARCH 2009
FROM STARVE ACRE (GR: 842592)

Hares:  Tony Case (Fruit’n’Nut)

Hounds:   Tony Soane (Sony Tone), Alan Jewell (Easy Rider), Sue Figgis (Centre of Attraction), Richard McAllister (Mountain Rescue), Chris Farmer (Bidet), Derrick Gray (Prime8), Brian Langford (Cyclone), Sarah Nagel (Petal), Les Salmon (Ever Ready), Judith Bridges (‘Er Indoors), Mette Sorensen (Leg Over), Paul Duncan (Old Grouser), Ron Peasley (Hi Hat), Clem Maginniss (Hard Hat Harry), Steve Nagel (Silvier Fox), Brian Simpson (Commercial Whale), Sharon Harvey (Olympic Feat) and Geoff Cooke (Free Ryde).

A good turnout (eventually) for a good run.  Commercial Whale arrived just in time and Fruit’n’Nut gave his usual brief and we set off with Silvier well to the fore.  By the time he, Silvier, found himself on the wrong track, two things had happened; Bidet had found the right way and sent others off to follow it while, from the wrong direction, Centre of Attraction appeared.  Not late this time, indeed so early was she that there were virtually no other cars and she set off to find us wherever we were.  Well, we were turning up for a 3 pm start, not a 2 pm start - so, for once, she was early, very early.  We had been told it was a varied trail and varied it was. Not too much in the way of hills but far too much watery shig.  We quickly came to the first regroup (actually we weren’t that quick but the regroup was shortly after we started).  Now we had to explain more of the Hash Format to our two newcomers while Silvier set off to find the trail.  The newcomers quickly caught on and the three of them created the van (a quaint term indicating the front runners) throughout the rest of the meet.  Out of nowhere came Hard Hat who had managed to catch up after arriving late – too many conferences, he said.  Another quick regroup had Easy Rider wondering if there were really eight regroups.  There weren’t - only six although two were only a few yards apart so it counts as only five. Now Cyclone uncharacteristically became front-runner and had us all running uphill, again. For a while we all seemed a bit lost but soon the dulcet tones of Sony led us down the slope to a bridging training area for a regroup and a welcome pause.  Into woodland we ran (not that we’d been out of trees for long) to a check that once again split the pack. A shortcutting MR came across the trail that sent Free Ryde (no relation to Free Tibet) one way and MR the other.  MR was overtaken by Silvier (who by now was complaining of a strained calf muscle) just in time for him to take the blame for leading the pack to a Back Back. Now Olympic Feat boasted that she had seen the flour leading in the correct direction but was ignored by MR; that’s life…  Over some very damp undergrowth, C of A’s little dog was not happy crossing an extensive area of low heather and when C of A asked if a lift was desired, a good number of Hashers wanted to take her up on the offer!  So we progressed and just over the hour we were all heading for home and the Down Downs that went to: the Hare who drank to himself, to ‘Er Indoors and Leg Over who had enjoyed the hills because they were not as steep as those on the Sunday North Hants Hash, to the two virgins Olympic Feat and Free Ryde, and for trying so hard to Easy Rider and Centre of Attraction.  Finally Old Grouser picked up one for being a ‘Hectic Pacer’ and running too fast (for his own good?).  The On Inn was the New Inn, sadly devoid of any proper beers, but jolly all the same.

NOTES ON DH3 RUN 284 ON WEDNESDAY 11^th FEBRUARY 2009
FROM CAESAR’S CAMP CAR PARK (GR: 844509)

Hare:  Alan Jewell (Easy Rider).

Hounds:   Vance Allen (Silver Jumper), Tony Case (Fruit’n’Nut), John Elder (Seis Matters), Sue Figgis (Centre of Attraction), Tony Soane (Sony Tone), Richard McAllister (Mountain Rescue), Kath Bradshaw (Twin Peaks), Chris Farmer (Bidet), Derrick Gray (Prime8), Brian Langford (Cyclone), Sarah Nagel (Petal), and Les Salmon (Ever Ready).

Car parking was not the easiest but there was just about room for those who wanted to run rather than take a dog for a walk.  Bidet, complete with ski sticks, set off apace encouraging Seis to overtake and lead us off on the wrong track.  Quickly brought back on course by the hare, we continued to have difficulty in spotting the flour spots amongst the remnants of the recent snowfall. Maybe off-white in such conditions is not such a good idea for a trail indicator. However, we progressed and swung off through the trees heading in a southerly direction.  The hare helpfully pointed out that the flour was dry whereas the snow was wet so we were expected to follow his trail with greater ease. Now we were led into an undulating area by Sony Tone with close support from F&N. They went the wrong way so it was up to Bidet once more to let his dulcet tones encourage the rest of us to follow – for a short while.  Now Seis was getting serious and taking the lead over towards some serious undulations.  Silver Jumper and Seis started alternating the lead while Prime8 did what he could to keep up.  As we broke out of the closer well-forested area we were somewhat relieved to find that the sun was actually quite warm while we waited at a regroup.  Along some wide2paths before another regroup and Bidet issuing loud orders in military fashion to back markers to catch up quickly.  He was concerned to be told that 150 armed soldiers exercising in the area were responding to his instructions! (Later, having decided enough was enough, he headed for home but found himself in the midst of an infantry platoon attack.  H e survived). The trail now took us downhill only to find we had to go up again – surprise, surprise.  At the top there was confusion and the trail was completely lost.  The hare had changed his mind and re-laid this part.  MR and CofA were now on trail and going down again and on to a narrow path that was found to be highly waterlogged.  Those carefully kept dry feet very quickly became exceedingly wet.   Once we were through this part, the field greatly spread out while MR found the trail with Ever Ready close on his heels.  Meanwhile, Seis had taken the wrong check but soon caught up by SCB-ing.  The run in was very pleasant and gently downhill all the way home.  All in all a most enjoyable trail.  In getting his down down the hare was congratulated on his selection of ‘super shig’.  Sony Tone and Silver Jumper were awarded theirs for being trailblazers, although the former really got his for chatting up some birds.  Centre of Attraction (late as usual) reached ‘Olympic Heights’ and Bidet for turning up when it was not particularly fair weather.  Ever Ready got his for being the Best Shiggy Finder when he landed up to his knees.  The On Inn near Tesco provided limited beer but at least it was wet.

On On ...

NOTES ON DH3 RUN 282 ON WEDNESDAY 14^th JANUARY 2009
FROM THE TWESELDOWN (GR: 822518)

Hares:  Neil Warren (Armoured Farmer) and Paul Armstrong (Back Up).

Hounds:   Richard McAllister (Mountain Rescue), Sarah Nagel (Petal), Alan Jewell (Easy Rider), Tony Case (Fruit’n’Nut), Mike Billups (Haagen Dash), Brian Langford (Cyclone), John Elder (Seis Matters), Judith Bridges (‘Er Indoors), Sue Figgis (Centre of Attraction), Les Salmon (Ever Ready), Tony Soane (Sony Tone), Kath Bradshaw (Twin Peaks), Mette Cobley (Leg Over), Peter Cunningham (Cunninglingus), Derrick Gray (Prime8), Clem Maginnis (Hard Hat Harry), Ron Peasley (Hi Hat), Andy Rogers (Sky Hi), Alan Fiddler (Outrider) and Damien Pealin (NNY), and finally as a non-runner Chris Farmer (Bidet).

The fog had cleared by the time we wanted to start and we were only five minutes late with our departure.  This was still not enough leeway for our latecomers, Centre of Attraction, Cunninglingus and Damien Pealin (appearing for the first time with us and still nameless).  However, they caught us up after crossing the north eastern part of the football field over to the horse training compound.  At this stage the going became stressful as it was gently uphill for quite some way and most were feeling the strain as we warmed up.  At the first check there was considerable delay until Haagen Dash found the trail leading into the woods.  On joining a main path there was a momentary delay and then, surprise, surprise, it was another of our Hash newcomers, Outrider, who took the lead.  He pounded off down the hill and to everyone’s surprise pounded up the other side. It didn’t last and soon Fruit’n’Nut’s horn was heard luring the pack to join him as he made for the open ground back along the Tweseldown Road.  Fate then jumped in and MR, cutting back to join the main group, found flour leading back towards the hills and woods.  The first regroup gave a chance for the latecomers to catch up and soon Outrider was leading us off for the second time.  Now moving along main routes the going was fastish and mainly uphill.  Seis Matters and Haagen Dash led the way over to the ponds with the former being lucky with his guess as to which way we should turn.  Up and over the next rise it was now F&N who recognised another familiar path disappearing into the bush. Up and over the hill we found ourselves going down through some very dark woods – spooky.  At the bottom Hard Hat paused for a photo call thereby delaying a number of Hashers (but they weren’t in any great hurry) and we soon found ourselves with a long, hard uphill grind.  The upward trend continued with a certain inevitability and it was at this point that Cunninglingus caught us up.  He and MR felt confident that they were far enough ahead to be able to take it easy but the three habitual front- runners (the other two being joined now by Sky Hi) were not far enough behind for a significant gap.  At the trig point the anticipated regroup wasn’t and Cunninglingus ‘knew’ the way down – he was right. From here on the way home was essentially downhill all the way and somewhat of a relief to most.  Now comes an interesting point: Outrider had disappeared; no one had seen him for quite a while and having been a front runner on his first Hash we can but hope he has learnt a lesson – don’t push your luck at the front for too long!  Eventually he made it back to the circle to pick up his down down and his Hash Handle.  The Hares too got their down down for a good trail, with Centre of Attraction, Cunninglingus and Bidet getting theirs for being late, with Hard Hat Harry being awarded his for knowing that he was going to be unable to Hash for the next two meets.  Beers at the Tweseldown were well received and a convivial meeting enjoyed.  Until the next time…

On On

NOTES ON DH3 RUN 281 ON WEDNESDAY 31st  DECEMBER 2008
FROM RLC OFFICERS MESS (GR: 912588)

Hares:  Paul Duncan (Old Grouser) and Robyn Duncan (A Tipple).

Hounds:   Richard McAllister (Mountain Rescue), Sarah Nagel (Petal), Steve Nagel (Silvier Fox), Alan Jewell (Easy Rider), Tony Case (Fruit’n’Nut), Ian Angell (Hippo), Mike Billups (Haagen Dash), Brian Langford (Cyclone), Rik Rawcliffe (Giant Haystack), John Elder (Seis Matters), Judith Bridges (‘Er Indoors), Luke Bridges (Smash!), Tom Bridges (Little Big Horn), Steve Bridges (Hobble), Paul Cobbley (Horn), Sally Duncan (Ali Kat), Kim Dyos (Little Prick), James Roberts (No Entry), Sue Figgis (Centre of Attraction), Ian Lowers (City Slicker), Zoë McAllister (Wheeze), Les Salmon (Ever Ready), Tony Soane (Sony Tone), Steve Booker (Dickhead), Andy Ralph (Jolly Green Giant), Libby Ralph (Old Thumper), Bruce Gosden (NNY), Chris Gosden (NNY), Alison Cowie (NNY), Richard Castell (NNY), Andy Basham (NNY), Rachel Parker (NNY), Amelia Parker (NNY), Lucy Giles (Full Frontal), Denise Catlin, (Flying Doctor), Adrian Lambeth (Nettles), Steve Wheeler (Yorkie), Criss Noice (A Limp On) and  Peter Cunningham (Cunninglingus).

So, we found counting the numbers present too difficult at the start but it was a huge turnout by Deepcut standards.  By the time we finished, there were 39 hounds (excluding dogs) and two hares.  And, yes, it was quite cool with frost still lying over much of the course.  However, the pack set off in a northerly direction, through the trees, in reasonable order and not too late. The front-runners found themselves wending their way back and forth around winding, twisting, turning loops.  It kept everyone guessing and allowed the back runners to keep up but cutting across the loops.  At the first the trail looked as though it was turning back towards the Maultway, but by now Silvier was in his usual place at the front and found himself leading the pack up a wide track parallel to the main road.  The trail went on and on and on until a check back that looked as though the trail was about to cross the road after all.  But, no, by now Silvier had found the trail going back parallel to the way out so once again the tail enders were able to catch the leaders.  Then there was quite a long straightish bit of track running before the first regroup and Ali Kat working her camera as Hash Flash.  Spirits were still high and the newcomers getting the idea of what it was all about – it was not a lot warmer. Any confusion was quickly sorted and Fruit’n’Nut could be heard blowing his hooter far up another major track, a track which some thought would soon give way to veering off into the jungle.  Well, it did, eventually, but the long run got temperatures up to a more comfortable level. After more devious trails through the trees, up and down the many hilly parts in the area, with the sophisticated sounds from Horn’s fine bugle and the pathetic imitations from the hooters of Hippo and Fruit’n’Nut we were encouraged to proceed to the next regroup beside a sizeable hilltop open area.  Not for long did we pause and we were soon off on more undulations.  The front-runners now missed the trail and were in danger of losing the plot.  Judicious hailing from the Hare brought the pack back and up a steep rise once again. The short cutters declined the incline and soon found themselves lost looking for the trail where they anticipated it would go.  They didn’t get it quite right but managed to keep up – eventually. Now the trail took a down turn and for quite some way we continued down a long, long slope to the bottom.  There were those who were daft enough to go back up again, but most managed to stay at the lower altitude to follow the trail to the third (and last) regroup, just on the other side of the wide open space that we had visited already.  However, this time we were welcomed by Ali Kat who was equipped with tumblers, thermos flasks and mince pies and we stood around for a few moments enjoying delicious mulled wine and hot pies. It didn’t last and we set off for home through a patch of intense cold frost around the married quarters and back to the Mess as it was getting dark.  It had been a thoroughly good and devious trail with everyone safely back for the Circle.  Here the Hares got their due reward and others were called to task. Andy Basham and Alison Cowie were both virgins (“It’s been a while since I was called that!” – to quote Alison), No Entry and Old Thumper who were thought to have been able to do better, and finally to Mountain Rescue for avoiding many of the ‘mountains’, and to another virgin (for being such) who was duly named Full Frontal (something to do with her having been at the sharp end with Airborne Forces).   We were later (much later) kicked out of the Pine Ridge Golf Club bar because they wanted to prepare for their major upcoming New Year party…   On On and…

A very Happy New Year to all our readers

NOTES ON DH3 RUN 277 ON WEDNESDAY 5^th NOVEMBER 2008
FROM UPPER HALE (GR: 829492)

Hares:  Ian Gordon (Cruise Control) and Tony Soane (Sony Tone).

Hounds:  Tony Case (Fruit‘n’Nut), Vance Allen (Silver Jumper), Richard McAllister (Mountain Rescue), Sarah Nagel (Petal), Derrick Gray (Prime8), Ron Peasley (Hi Hat), Ian Angel (Hippo), Judith Bridges (‘Er Indoors), Metta Cobley (Leg Over), Brian Langford (Cyclone), Kath Bradshaw (Twin Peaks), Chris Farmer (Bidet), Sue Figgis (Centre of Attraction), Les Salmon (Ever Ready) and John Elder (Seis Matters).

 The weather was pretty awful; hugely overcast and fine, penetrating drizzle.  However, that did not put off the splendid pack. The hares were in communicative form – “It starts with one blob…” followed by a very short warning about a steep downhill bit that was surfaced with wet clay.  Well, we were quickly off because Cruise Control was almost standing on the first blob.  But, now came the start that led to your scribe getting separated from the main pack and will result in these skimpy notes.  By the time the trail was found, scribe was off in totally the wrong direction.  Making up for lost time he caught up at the first check only to find himself checking out another wrong trail (now you know why he hates being at the front).  By the time the trail was found, he was reluctant to lose his altitude gain but followed every move of the pack.  He followed them up the steep hill to the top of the mighty ridge, all the way down again only to find that the way was up the same ridge for a second time.   He followed them as they descended once more.  Wonderful thing is eyesight.  He could see the distant Seis Matters in the lead having taken over from Silver Jumper; he could make out Bidet encouraging a following and Fruit ‘n’Nut sounding off on his horn.  As they all came down the hill once more, there was some confusion until the trail was spotted once more.  In danger now of interfering with a military exercise, the trail led back away from the potential clash. Now moving over the old firing range, the pack was encouraged to go up the hill only to find that the trail descended once more.  There were those who went down and those who remained at the newly gained altitude.  The latter were the winners for indeed the trail came back up and went right to the top of the considerable rise.  Now your lonely scribe found himself unaccompanied once more so he is not sure who did what or where and when.  All made it back to the car park before the light completely faded.  Down downs were awarded to the hares for their trail laid in shig throughout: to the intelligentsia for their use of the ground (Seis Counts, Mountain Rescue, Centre of Attraction and ‘Er Indoors), to those who nearly lost it Ever Ready (his glasses) and Primate (something to do with a biting dog) and finally to the one who returned to this country to catch up with Real Ale, Cyclone.  The On Inn was the Six Bells in Farnham where they do not serve chips until 6.00 pm unless prior arrangements have been made.  Apart from that it was a good gathering…

On, on and on

NOTES ON DH3 RUN 276 ON WEDNESDAY 22^nd OCTOBER 2008
FROM FRIMLEY LODGE COUNTRY PARK (GR: 887563)

Hares:  Ian Lowers (City Slicker) and Tony Case (Fruit‘n’Nut)

Hounds:  Vance Allen (Silver Jumper), Rik Rawcliffe (Giant Haystack), Richard McAllister (Mountain Rescue), Alan Jewell (Easy Rider), Sarah Nagel (Petal), Derrick Gray (Prime8), Neil Warren (Armoured Farmer), Ian Warren (Fly By), Paul Duncan (Old Grouser), Ron Peasley (Hi Hat), Tony Soane (Sony Tone), Ian Angel (Hippo), Judith Bridges (‘Er Indoors), Metta Cobley (Leg Over), Paul Gallagher (Spring Lamb), Brian Langford (Cyclone) and Clem Maginness (Hard Hat Harry).

It was just a great day for Hashing.  From a weather point of view, anyway.  And the company was good with a good turnout.  So we started as usual with the Hares’ brief; sadly City Slicker had ‘forgotten’ where they had gone, so Fruit‘n’Nut (with convincing confidence) sent us on our way – in totally the wrong direction.  City Slicker quickly remembered that the start was 180 degrees in the opposite direction (for indeed that is just what 180 degrees would indicate) so in military terms we all  ‘about turned’.  Into the park proper we went with Fly By and Silver Jumper to the fore. The trail went deeper into the park to the first check that caused some consternation.  The first to call ‘On On’ was Sony Tone for, indeed, he had discovered three distinct and very well laid blobs of flour.  HOWEVER, the next flour he found was a distinct false trail marker.  Sooo, another ‘about turn’ got us all back on the right track and we soon found ourselves floundering on the canal bank.  The swans were not pleased to see the canine hashers and some vicious hissing soon put them in their place.  Meanwhile the real hounds were now off along the canal path.  Fly By and Hard Hat led the way back into the park only for them to find the trail actually led back on to the canal path.  By now Silver Jumper had reached the road, ignored the regroup and disappeared off over the canal bridge and along the road.  The main pack reassembled and soon set of in slow pursuit.  Back into the trees to the other side of the canal where we paused for the front-runners to do their duty.  A kindly hare hint to the fair feminine trio overheard by foul buck took us off through the local jungle where we struggled up a steep hill.  Puffing and blowing was now the order of the day as a hilltop check caused a considerable delay with hounds in all directions, all down.  That, of course, meant that several had to climb back up.  Hard Hat was now at the fore giving lusty encouragement to the rest only to find another regroup.  A momentary delay and we were off once more to wide open space where several paths met.  Having witnessed last time Fruit‘n’Nut struggle up an exceeding steep slope to no avail, there were those who were greatly suspicious and felt that this was time for his revenge.  And how right those suspicions were.  It was not only Dennis (Old Grouser’s dog) who went up on all fours.  As the crow flew it was but a hundred yards from the regroup but as Hashers flew it felt like a hundred miles to the next regroup at the top.  Once all assembled, Hounds dispersed in all directions but the right one, so another female friendly hint, once more overheard, took the pack off.  Now, He Who Hates to be Front-runner found himself where he didn’t really want to be until Fly By was encouraged to fly by.  And so it finished with Prime8 on the wrong side of the canal and the recovering-from-wounds Hippo wandering on to the trail just before the end.  A basically good and enjoyable trail in glorious weather.  Down downs went to the Hares, to the returning Hard Hat (who was once our GM) and to Old Grouser (our current GM) as we sang to the Hash Higher Arky (or should that be Hire Arkie?), to Fly By on receiving his tag and his dad ‘The Old and the New’, and finally to those in need, Hippo (recovering from his broken ankle) and Cyclone (recovering from the Spanish sunshine).  We then repaired to the Rose and Thistle in Frimley Green where they were selling some fine ales and hosting a really fine bunch of questionable runners.

NOTES ON DH3 RUN 275 ON WEDNESDAY 8th  OCTOBER 2008
FROM POTTER’S RESTAURANT (GR: 894549)

Hares:  Vance Allen (Silver Jumper) and Rik Rawcliffe (Giant Haystack)

Hounds:  Richard McAllister (Mountain Rescue), Alan Jewell (Easy Rider), Sarah Nagel (Petal), Steve Nagel (Silvier Fox), Tony Case (Fruit‘n’Nut), Derrick Gray (Prime8), Andy Rogers (Sky Hi) Neil Warren (Armoured Farmer), Ian Warren (No Name Yet), Paul Armstrong (Back Up), Alex Duncan (Flying Storker), Sally Duncan (Ali Kat), Chris Farmer (Bidet), Ron Peasley (Hi Hat), Les Salmon (Ever Ready) and Tony Soane (Sony Tone).

So now we know, it’s official – there are a good number of wimps in the Deepcut Hash (almost as many as in the North Hants Hash).  Last time we met, there were but ten of us in the rain and last Sunday when the NH4 met in the persistent precipitation there were only nine.  But today in the sunshine there were eighteen.  However, there was no sign of the hares when we wanted to start so we started without them.  As ever, it was Silvier who went straight to the front, overtaking a walking Mountain Rescue on the way and closely followed by the yet not-named Ian Warren.  Soon they were off up the hill while the overtaken wandered off on his own but in a similar direction.  The main pack followed Silvier and that was probably sensible as he was the one ‘on’.  Soon the ‘overtaken’ was alone at the top of the hill while the rest went off on a lower track.  Eventually, they met again but not before the high up back back was discovered.  At the bottom of the hill we all met up at a regroup.  By now the hares had caught up on their bicycles and we realised how they had laid the trail (not much of an advantage as they found out – running up hill is easier than cycling uphill).  Anyway, once we were all together, Silvier was off and up the hill towards the Old Guildford Road, Sony Tone was off in another direction, Bidet idly waiting for someone to find the trail, Armoured Farmer checking out another possibility and Fruit’n’Nut striding off up a very steep hill at the top of which was the back back to which mention was earlier made.  Primate remained static and admired the energy expenditure.  The hares were delighted to witness Silvier closely followed by Ian and Sky Hi disappearing up the hill in the wrong direction.  By now, Mountain Rescue had noticed a hare up a different path and on overtaking him saw some flour and was informed that was the second blob.  Sony Tone continued along the wrong path until wisdom brought him back to where the rest were now following. It must have been about now that the RA overheard a very private conversation between mother and daughter that led to their down downs.  The trail became a bit more puzzling but was eventually found by Silvier and his gang of front-runners that now included Sky Hi.   The rear-running Hi Hat was the cause that led to the new Hash cry of ‘On On Ron’ that probably fell on deaf ears.  Ali Kat was taking short cuts while the rest found themselves running parallel to the Old Guildford Road for a while; for quite a while.  The trail led off in the ‘wrong’ direction back uphill, again, to a significant path. Then we turned back in the direction of home to come across a sign that read ‘1000 m’ with an arrow pointing straight down the main track.  Bidet claimed it to be but 976m only but the redeeming feature of this part of the run was that it was downhill all the way.  At the bottom by the gate, Silvier stopped and that allowed Bidet to be the first one home, closely followed by an extraordinary mix of back runners who somehow found themselves very near the front after 55 minutes of movement.  Down downs were awarded to the ‘irreplaceable’ hares for a good run, to Bidet for being first and to Silvier for stopping and looking as though he was coming in last, to the wise and beautiful Ali Kat and Flying Storker, to Mountain Rescue for carrying an injury, Hi Hat (for wearing a new Deepcut Hash shirt and Nameless (for being a virgin runner although he had helped to lay Trail No 180!), the three being described as the ‘Proud and Wonderful’ (who knows what was meant by that), and finally to Petal out of her new shoes.  Potters offered ale and bonhomie while their chips scored 6.5 on the chip scale.  All in all, a very satisfactory gathering…

On On…

NOTES ON DH3 RUN 274 ON WEDNESDAY 24^th  SEPTEMBER 2008
FROM TUNNEL HILL (GR: 918558)

Hare:  Richard McAllister (Mountain Rescue)

Hounds:  Alan Jewell (Easy Rider), Sarah Nagel (Petal), Steve Nagel (Silvier Fox), Tony Case (Fruit‘n’Nut), Judith Bridges (‘Er Indoors), Metta Cobley (Leg Over), Derrick Gray (Prime8), Andy Rogers (Sky Hi) and Neil Warren (Armoured Farmer).

Once again, the wimps were highlighted; “I’m not running if it’s raining” or “I’m going to the Gym if it’s wet” simply aren’t excuses good enough.  And as for “I’ve got to go to the dentist…”  Anyway, there were nine brave souls who turned up to support the drenched hare who had spent several hours in the rain to lay a trail that set off across the road and immediately into trees.  By now the sky had brightened and the rain had ceased.  As ever, Silvier was to the fore but not for long before he was stumped by the false trail.  There was considerable turmoil while Hounds fussed around until Sky Hi gave that welcoming call and the pack was really off on its way along the path almost parallel to the Pirbright road.  Down through the trees which was very pleasant running; soft under foot and open forest leading to a small stream.  This caused a certain concern.  Fruit‘n’Nut tried to jump it but got a very muddy foot for his efforts.  There was a drier way over that was used by those in less of a hurry.  Up the bank into a well known open area.  Now Sky Hi was off in the wrong direction, and Silvier picked up the trail that now led back into the trees, down a path to the same stream, but this time we ran alongside.  The FRBs returned towards the rest of the pack having found a back back.  At this point they had missed an enormous tree with branches forming a very handy handrail that took them dryly across the stream.  Having been warned about just how slippery the trunk was, watching Petal bum shuffle was an absolute picture to experience.  ‘Er Indoors attempted the jump and ended up with an exceedingly muddy foot; at least it was the same foot that suffered a similar fate at the first water jump.  By now, Silvier was leading the pack again back to the road but it was Fruit’n’Nut who actually found the trail at the top of the rise on the far side where the trail led to the railway bridge and the first regroup.  After some dithering, Easy Rider found the trail going up the hill and over the top and down the other side.  Much hunting around before Silvier picked up the scent and led us off up the hill.  Now Armoured Farmer expressed his upset because he had almost made it to the trail when he turned back.  Eventually the trail was found again and the pack surged forward along a main track and up to the top of a hill.  Here there was more confusion with the main FRBs ferreting around to no avail but Easy Rider was encouraged to follow his first thoughts and soon found that his instinct was worth following.  There was no overtaking at this part so it was Easy Rider who led down through close country and up alongside the road and back into the trees up familiar tracks and across the Old Guildford Road.  More concern as the FRBs could not find the trail – not their fault this time, the rain had all but washed away the first and most important marker.  Silvier now called everyone on but then went on a false trail.  On his return, he ignored the Hare’s advice no to go up that hill…  Meanwhile Fruit‘n’Nut had picked up the scent and not only led us all for perhaps the longest stretch of running, but actually found the trail again after the check.  Now we were going uphill through close trees.  At the second regroup at the top, Fruit’n’Nut went off right while the rest of the pack kept straight on as the Hare intended.  That was the last we saw of Fruit‘n’Nut for some time.  Silvier now ranged far and wide looking for the trail and happened upon it by accident.  Once more downhill through some very close country, up the other side and back over the Old Guildford Road.  By now tiredness was setting in so the friendly Hare advised the back runners and shepherded them home along the ridges parallel to the railway line.  Silvier had lost himself somewhere in the hills but managed to keep contact and actually finished before most.  Meanwhile, Fruit‘n’Nut was really lost (five times, he said after) but eventually got home and insisted on down downs for those still remaining:  the Hare, of course, and Easy Rider, Silvier and Petal, all for being ‘miscreants’.  We repaired to Potters for beer and a chip (very good chips, soft centres, crispy outside, hot and tasty – Graded 8).  It was here that Fruit‘n’Nut regaled us about the art of sheep rolling!!

With that, On On

NOTES ON DH3 RUN 273 ON WEDNESDAY 10^th  SEPTEMBER 2008
FROM WOODLANDS WALK (GR: 850581)

Hare:  Alan Jewell (Easy Rider)

Hounds:  Tony Soane (Sony Tone), Richard McAllister (Mountain Rescue), Sarah Nagel (Petal), Vance Allen (Silver Jumper), Steve Nagel (Silvier Fox), Tony Case (Fruit’n’Nut), Les Salmon (Ever Ready), Kath Bradshaw (Twin Peaks), Judith Bridges (‘Er Indoors), Metta Cobley (Leg Over) and Ron Peasley (Hi Hat).

Perhaps the saddest part of this performance was the clapping afterwards for the Hare’s standard of trail; it was good, but there was no need to let him know just how much it was appreciated.  There were errors.  For instance the number of regroups, the excessiveness of which was appreciated by some of the slugs in the pack.  And the one hill was indeed used time and again to get us all undulating.  However, much of it was over land not seen before by many and so trying to pre-empt the Hare’s trail was not so easy.  The start was simple and Silvier and Silver Jumper were soon off into the training area leaving Fruit’n’Nut to go off on the wrong track.  In no time at all we were at the first regroup and it was Silver Jumper who found the restart.  Much of the running was through close tracks within the rhododendron thickets.  Another regroup and Silvier was off calling everyone else back into line.  And so it continued through some very pleasant running to the Lake’s edge where we were stopped for another regroup.  There was considerable reluctance to take to the water but Silvier set off and was fortunate enough to find the trail leading, not through, but along the edge of the water for a while.  Into the trees and tall bracken it was quite difficult to see just where Silvier was going but we managed to hear him most of the time.  More stops, more checks and even Fruit’n’Nut found himself at the front at one stage.  Then there was the back-packed Sony Tone taking his turn at the front. Not to be outdone, it was Ever Ready who once found himself to the fore after a regroup when we all though he was going into the tree for a bit of relief but it turned out that he was just investigating when he found the trail – he never did get his pee.  Then came quite a long search that gave the main pack a bit of a rest but the front-runners were doing their bit exhausting themselves and giving the middle runners a chance of keeping up – apart from Hi Hat who remained firmly at the back of the pack for most of the way, pacing himself with care.  What was interesting is that no one did anything daft or really worth reporting.  So plain was the pack’s behaviour that the RA had difficulty in thinking up reasons for down downs.  So, we ended up with:  the Hare, two returnees in the form of ’Er Indoors and Leg Over, the explorers Silver Jumper who was accused of taking on all the checks and Petal who assaulted every bramble bush with reach, and to a faithful returnee to old hunting grounds, in the form of Ever Ready.  We progressed to the New Inn for the traditional ales and good humour and found that, yes, they did sell chips that attracted a score of 7* (they would have be a higher grade if they had been hotter but the star is given for the speed with which they were produced, which was quite phenomenal).

It was decided that in future, the Hare (who buys the flour for the trail) would not have to pay the £1 run fee.

We hope to see a greater pack next time and also hope that there is no more bowling on an ‘Ash Wednesday’!

On On to one and all.           

NOTES ON DH3 RUN 272 ON WEDNESDAY 27^th  AUGUST 2008
FROM LIGHWATER COUNTRY PARK (GR: 902618)

Hare:  Tony Soane (Sony Tone),

Hounds:  Richard McAllister (Mountain Rescue), Sarah Nagel (Petal), Vance Allen (Silver Jumper), Paul Gallagher (Spring Lamb), Steve Nagel (Silvier Fox), Tony Case (Fruit’n’Nut), Derrick Gray (Prime8), Rick Rawcliffe (Giant Haystack) and Les Salmon (Ever Ready).

So while your scribe was away no one thought of writing up some notes – or, if they did, did nothing about it.  For record purposes the names of those attending the two meets are reflected in this short report.  And talking of ‘short’ our hare assured us his trail was short.  Once more the generic hare has lied to the hounds and we embarked on what he, the hare, admitted was much more hilly than his childhood memories. He also advised that the blackberries en route were very good (now that was not a lie). So we set off into the park only to turn sharp left down the hill towards the main road.  This manoeuvre left the fast running Silvier an opportunity to catch up with rest of the pack.  By now Spring Lamb and Silver Jumper were to the fore with Giant Haystack not far behind. An excited F&N was blowing his horn in encouragement as we flowed down with the hill.  After what seemed like quite a long time we found ourselves struggling uphill with no sign of a check.  The uphill was indeed steep and left all but the fittest feeling somewhat puffed.  And so we continued; Silvier, Spring Lamb and Silver Jumper became the front-runners with Giant Haystack, Ever Ready, Petal and MR somewhere in the middle, Prime8 sucking on his asthma thingy whatsit and at the back, way, way back was F&N blowing on his horn in self-encouragement but unsuccessfully trying to confuse the hounds all to the front of him.  And so it continued until about half way when we actually had the first of a number of checks.  At one point we were all held up because the trail had been rubbed out.  This was the first real opportunity to sample the blackberries (and very good they were).  The Hare (once he had caught up) soon put us right and we were off into the depths of the local jungle once more.  Then we got lost again and well spread out with MR checking what turned out to white stones and not flour.  Another little trick Nature played was producing a sort of moss, very pale in colour so that it looked just like bird-pecked flour.  Anyway, quite by accident MR came across a regroup, so regroup we did.  Now the short cutters were offered an alternative ‘easier’ route while the main body ploughed on behind the now front-runner blowing his horn in group encouragement. It didn’t last.  He was soon at the back again. The vanguard led us on and soon we were at the bridge over the motorway.  The courageous Silver Jumper, closely followed by Silvier, checked over the bridge only to find that, yes, it was the real way home.  From here on the trail was simple with plentiful supplies of splendid blackberries on the way.  The main pack was followed later, much later, by the short cutters who had apparently also been distracted by the berries.  The circle formed and the hare was awarded his down down for laying a very pleasant run.  Giant Haystack made the error of wearing new shoes from which he drank his down down and Spring Lamb picked up his for being such a keen front-runner. The Nagels got one each for some spurious reason while Prime8 and Mountain Rescue were nominated to drink for the Blackberry Eaters. The pack retired to the Pine Ridge Golf Course for a draught and chip.

On, On.

RUN 271  13 AUGUST 2008, FARNHAM PARK GOLF COURSE (GR 838475)
Hares: Chris Farmer and Martin Potter (Goofy) Hounds: Paul Armstrong (Back Up), Tony Case (Fruit’n’Nut), Alex Duncan (Flying Storker), Paul Duncan (Old Grouser), Sally Duncan (Ali Kat), Sue Figgis (Centre of Attraction) and daughter, Alan Jewell (Easy Rider), Ron Peasley (Hi Hat), Tony Soane (Sony Tone) and Neil Warren (Armoured Farmer)

RUN 270  30 JULY 2008, CRANMORE LANE (ROWHILL NATURE RESERVE) (GR849500)
Hares: Sarah Nagel (Petal) and Steve Nagel (Silvier Fox) Hounds: Allen Vance (Silver Jumper), Paul Armstrong (Back Up), Tony Case (Fruit’n’Nut), Paul Duncan (Old Grouser), Kim Dyos (Little Prick), Chris Farmer (Bidet), Alex Fryatt (Toby), Derrick Gray (Prime8), Alan Jewell (Easy Rider), Rick Rawcliffe (Giant Haystack), Les Salmon (Ever Ready), Tony Soane (Sony Tone) and Neil Warren (Armoured Farmer).

NOTES ON DH3 RUN 269 ON WEDNESDAY 16th  JULY 2008
FROM POTTERS RESTAURANT (GR: 894549)

Hares:  Kath Bradshaw (Twin Peaks) and Tony Soane (Sony Tone),

Hounds:  Richard McAllister (Mountain Rescue), Sarah Nagel (Petal), Vance Allen (Silver Jumper), Paul Gallagher (Spring Lamb), Ian Angell (Hippo), Paul Duncan (Old Grouser), Chris Farmer (Bidet), Sue Figgis (Centre of Attraction), Steve Nagel (Silvier Fox), Rachel Parkinson (Park ‘n’ Ride), Ron Peasley (Hi Hat), Andy Rogers (Sky Hi) and Neil Warren (Armoured Farmer)

Fine weather and a good turnout indicated a great potential.  From the start it was into the woods with Silvier to the fore. The rest followed on in their own time with Bidet on his sticks (and this before he’d had a drink); he said to support his knees but we knew it was to help him keep upright.  At the first check it was finally Silver Jumper who happened upon the trail and off he went only to be stymied.  Silvier was suspicious of the more obvious trail going up the steep hill so he took the (wrong) path leading to the canal.  Sony Tone expressed his delight at seeing Silver Jumper and Sky Hi returning down the steep hill from a false trail, while the On On was called from in the jungle vaguely back the way we had come but off just enough to take us off and away into the wilderness. We soon heard Hippo’s horn and through the trees (rather around the trees) we went.  The only bit of excitement was witnessed by few: Hi Hat got his feet tangled by a twig in the undergrowth and he collapsed face first (fortunately not at high speed, because that’s not the way he goes) and his only concern was not his delicate features but his spectacles, which fortunately remained intact. Then we found ourselves at the top of the rise.  While hunting around, suddenly Centre of Attraction appeared having arrived only 15 minutes late and having ‘cheated’ and made straight for the commotion created by the pack – that’s why we keep calling.  At the top it was a long straight run along the track parallel to the Old Guildford Road with Dennis dragging a wearying Old Grouser and Spring Lamb trying to keep up with his hound.  Park ‘n’ Ride was up front and now it was inevitably down hill.  Silvier had disappeared long since and we anticipated his excuse that we were unable to hear his calls because of the aircraft noise from Airshow. Now we were making for home. The trail led back towards the married quarters area. By now it was all the front-runners and one ‘SCB’ who were at the front (Silvier had already finished).  MR was way ahead at the front of the pack but had missed the twist in the trail (not that he was interested, he was too near home) and it was Silver Jumper, Spring Lamb, Armoured Farmer and Sky Hi who led the main pack back round the true trail.  All home in 45 minutes or thereabouts having had an enjoyable run and (oh joy) no circle, no down downs because you-know-who was away marching in Nijmegen. So, we all rapidly pushed off to Potters where we enjoyed an ale or two and CHIPS – the first time for ages and very good chips they were, attracting a considered score of no less than 8.5 for their crispness, consistency, flavour, texture lack of excess fat, and general appearance.  You see, this chip grading is taken very seriously by DH3…

NOTES ON DH3 RUN 268 ON WEDNESDAY 2nd  JULY 2008
FROM 5 DETTINGEN ROAD (GR: 913578)

Hares:  Flash Gordon (Cruise Control) and Terry Newland (Rainbow Man)

Hounds: Tony Soane (Sony Tone), Richard McAllister (Mountain Rescue), Tony Case (Fruit’n’Nut), Sarah Nagel (Petal), Vance Allen (Silver Jumper), Alan Jewell (Easy Rider), Kath Bradshaw (Twin Peaks), Paul Gallagher (Spring Lamb) and Rick Rawcliffe (Giant Haystack)

A disappointing turnout for what turned out to be a good run, full of dastardly diversions and tricky turns.  A swift brief warned that there were a couple of regroups a few back backs.  We left No 5 and set off across the grass common with Sony and Jumper up front.  As we paused for a check on the far side we could see the forlorn figure of Petal making a beeline across to join us (it was not an easy start to find if you did not know the area so her lateness was forgiven.  The trail was picked up going past the Officers Mess and then lost again. Jumper and MR found the trail and were now convinced we were about to cross the main road.  But, no; Fruit’n’Nut’s horn indicated that we were actually going off into the bush once more before crossing over the road.  No, again; the trail turned back and we found ourselves making for the range boundary fence.  Now Jumper took up the lead once more with MR still daft enough to follow.  Down to the bottom went we, with Jumper confidently leading the pack to a back back.  By this time the front-runners had needlessly risen to the crest of the next rise.  So, back we went to the range fence only to find we had to run over The Sisters.  Up and down, up and down we went to a welcome regroup.  By now we appreciated that we had run quite a long way to get nowhere.  There was a long pause while Twin Peaks checked out a false trail and Jumper came back with F’n’N.  Sony decided that the hares hadn’t gone along an old path, and Easy Rider waited with Haystack for someone to find the trail.  Cruise Control had to give a hint and we set off for quite a long straightish run before breaking off into the trees once more.  Soon we were halted by a lack of flour and MR was the ‘lucky one’ to find it was he who had stumbled on to the true trail. Up and down through the trees we went again until the inevitable check but it was MR whose luck stayed with him and the pack followed.  By now the hard working Spring Lamb got to front spot and stayed there.  Turning back towards the quarters hopes were raised when the ‘ON INN’ sign was seen on the ground.  Nearly there, we thought.  Then the assault course came into view and we knew we still had some way to go.  It was a long run in but Cruise Control had got the BBQ going by the time the first runners we home.  Then in came the pseudo Irishman (F’n’N) with “That was good.  Exactly an hour or thereabouts…” but then he was right on two counts – it was good and it was thereabouts.  In the garden of No 5 the pack formed an unusual seated circle as the clouds lifted and the sun came out.  Down downs went to the hares, to Easy Rider and Mountain Rescue for claiming to be athletes, Twin Peaks (who was unusually still at the party) for being a welcome stopper, to Ankle Snatcher Sony Tone, and finally to Giant Haystack on behalf of his exhausted dog, the four-legged champion.

By the way, there were more than a few back backs – there were at least two every half mile, probably more.

No chips, but the BBQ was awarded 10.75 points out of 10.  Our thanks to the Gordons for their kind hospitality by laying on the food.

On On…

NOTES ON DH3 RUN 267 ON WEDNESDAY 18th  JUNE 2008
FROM UPPER HALE (GR: 829492)

Hares:  Brian Langford (Cyclone) and assisted by Tony Soane (Sony Tone)

Hounds:

Richard McAllister (Mountain Rescue), Ian Angell (Hippo), Neil Warren (Armoured Farmer), Tony Case (Fruit’n’Nut), Sarah Nagel (Petal), Steve Nagel (Silvier Hare), Sue Figgis (Centre of Attraction), Vance Allen (Silver Jumper), Derek Gray (Prime8), Alan Jewell (Easy Rider), David Holgate (Necrophiliac), Alex Fryatt (Toby), Les Salmon (Ever Ready), Ron Peasley (Hi Hat) and Terry Newland (Rainbow Man).

Sunday’s first joint Hash (Run 266A) with NH4 went very well with some eight of our runners turning up for the event.

On now to our latest, with just two minutes to go, the two hares, tired and well floured, arrived at the start with much relief at getting back before the pack was due to set off.  The rain held off as Cyclone warned that the trail may not be short and may be difficult, and that put everyone at ease.  The start was fairly traditional as we followed Silvier (who else) in a general westerly direction until he was stopped by a check.  He, Silver Jumper and Ever Ready now set off on the more obvious tracks while Mountain Rescue found an overgrown stile on an overgrown track that looked quite interesting.  So it was off down said track and the start of what seemed to be a fairly constant downhill trail through the trees and deeper into the training area.  It was rather pleasant running, although surprisingly warm.  It was not long before Silvier was up front again while the rest of the pack followed up what was a slope of some significant steepness.  The regroup was at the trig point, the highest point in the area.  Our newcomers, Necro and Toby, were right up there at the front but even they appreciated the short break.  Prime8 by now had thought better of going to the top and he had been sent on a more friendly route.  Once we restarted, it was, again, Silvier who called us all on for the start of the long descent; a drop that seemed to go on for ever, filling fearful minds with thoughts of the equally long haul back up at some stage. Another regroup allowed Prime8 to catch up kept the pack together while our habitual front runner took off once more down towards the lakes.  Skirting part of the water, it was off towards the Bourley Road and we were still not turning for home. The trail now led around to the lakes again to another pause while Fruit’n’Nut, Hippo and Prime8 were allowed to rejoin the more fleet of foot.  Criticism that the hares had forgotten that they were laying a trail for the Deepcut Hash was well accepted by tiring hounds while discussion and conjecture as to the way ahead was mainly rubbish.  You know who got us going again and from then on it was mainly uphill the rest of the way, except for the flat run in for home.  It seemed a long one, but watches confirmed that it was the usual hour (perhaps we were running faster?).  Down downs went to the hares, of course, and to our newcomers while Alex was named To Be or not To Be (hereon known as Toby).  There was then some inexplicable, meandering waffle about Mountain Rescue and Ever Ready who received their down downs for “did and didn’t” or something and finally one went to Hi Hat who turned up in his top hat – can you top that?  On then to the Six Bells in Farnham where the ale was good, the company better but the chips non-existent.  Overall, a great event enhanced only by the late and very short appearance of Centre of Attraction who arrived even later than we started and managed to follow the trail all the way to the pub.

NOTES ON DH3 RUN 266 ON WEDNESDAY 4th  JUNE 2008
FROM RUSHMOOR ARENA (GR: 850518)

Hare:  Richard McAllister (Mountain Rescue),

Hounds: Ian Angell (Hippo), Neil Warren (Armoured Farmer), Tony Case (Fruit’n’Nut), Sarah Nagel (Petal), Steve Nagel (Silvier Hare), Sue Figgis (Centre of Attraction), Rachel Parkinson (Park’n’Ride), Clare Silman (One Way Only), Vance Allen (Silver Jumper), Kath Bradshaw (Twin Peaks), Kim Dyos (Little Prick), Derek Gray (Prime8), Alan Jewell (Easy Rider), Andy Rogers (Sky Hi) and Tony Soane (Sony Tone)

We could not have had better weather – the sun shone and much of the trail was under the cover of trees and Centre of Attraction was only two minutes late.  The going was damp and in many places inundated and swampy.  But the Hounds loved it really.  Having been warned that we should all be back by teatime, possibly late teatime, the pack set off north from the car park and down through some sun-speckled woodland to the first check that held the pack for quite a long period.  The main tracks produced nothing and it was eventually Park’n’Ride who realised she was nearly standing on the flour.  So it was off up a level to the driver training area and across to the far wood line.  Further delays with Hippo ‘feeling it in his water’ that the trail was half right through the trees, so off he set.  Before he had gone far, Silvier was yelling that he was on and off he went.  The trail now followed a motorcycle path through the trees right up to the first inundation that was quite deep. Here, Hippo sloshed his way through while Twin Peaks tried to find a dry crossing and nearly made it, and Petal and One Way Only had the sense to follow the hare.  Once through the problem area and into the open, the pack went mad. Silvier was to the fore on the wrong track, with Sony Tone and Silver Jumper similarly disorientated. The rest waited for someone else to find the trail, which did eventually happen.  Silvier, once more in the lead descended into a goodly dip followed by the rest of the pack.  Once at the bottom it was back up the other side to a regroup where we met that well-known short cutter, Prime8.  With the pack wide spread it was Hippo, still following the feeling in his water who led the pack off but just too far for comfort as the trail turned sharply to cross over two parallel tracks and into the trees again.  Park’n’Ride was once more a front-runner (by mistake, she said) while Silvier had to cut back from the back back.  The next major delay was trying to find the trail on the far side of Long Valley.  The voice of a mystery short-cutter announced the trail had been discovered and the led uphill to a one blob check where Sky Hi discovered the easy falsie while it took the expertise of Silvier to find the more difficult downhill one.  Petal then found the hidden flour and it was off again through some young but close country.  Then there was doubt before Silvier discovered a long, sweeping trail leading back to a main path, down the hill and across two more paths before a long check that had the pack puzzled.  Sony Tone eventually, after the pack admitted defeat, picked up the trail that led to a pair of back backs before Silvier took off through some very tight country, twisting and turning, crossing another path before cutting through a ‘tunnel’ in the undergrowth. Out in the open once again and the pack was invited to follow a trail laid with white mine tape because underfoot was too rough to take flour.  Through the gorse, scrub, tufts and sludge meandered the strung out pack.  The first to arrive at the top were able to enjoy the breeze and sight of the struggling pack.  Difficulty was experienced finding the next ‘on’ but then the pack found itself at the second regroup and Petal led the way down to a familiar junction.  An overenthusiastic Sky Hi demonstrated how not to jump over a puddle and drenched not only himself but many within striking distance.  Then Twin Peaks fell off a makeshift bridge into the water before she managed to find the way through some more close undergrowth.  By now, there were those who were concerned about finishing in time to meet other commitments so we made direct for the finish.  Tired?  There were those who so thought, but then just imagine how tired the hare was…!  Down downs were awarded to the hare for a trail that was described by one as ‘good crap’, to happy blower, Hippo for his horn work, to shiggy skipper One Way Only, To Petal and Little Prick for knowing how to avoid water and to Prime8, the great adventurer for finding his own way round.  The On Inn was the Swan on the Farnborough road where we sat on the patio in the sun and enjoyed the view of aircraft landing on the airfield.

NOTES ON DH3 RUN 265 ON WEDNESDAY 21^st  MAY 2008
FROM TUNNEL HILL (GR: 918558)

Hare:  Ian Angell (Hippo)

Hounds: Richard McAllister (Mountain Rescue), Neil Warren (Armoured Farmer), Paul Armstrong (Back Up), Tony Case (Fruit’n’Nut), Chris Farmer (Bidet), Sarah Nagel (Petal), Steve Nagel (Silvier Hare), Ron Peasley (Hi Hat) and Sue Higgis (Centre of Attraction).

Glorious weather again but a much smaller pack to enjoy it.  After warnings from the Hare that the roads were dangerous, the first thing we did was to cross the road and plunge down into the trees.  Silvier was the first to take a wrong check and Fruit’n’Nut the second.  Bidet found it and set off then Centre of Attraction (late again) arrived on the scene and Silvier, cutting across the undergrowth, came across the trail again.  We wended our way through the tree and on to the main path only to find Silvier returning from a back back and so Mountain Rescue found himself at the front and fast approaching the main road once more.  Over the road and Silvier was off (on the wrong path) with Bidet and MR performing similar acts of useless functions.  Meanwhile, the rest of the pack (less Armoured Farmer who had gone off on a tangent all of his own) found themselves making for Curzon Bridge where we all turned left into the Tunnel Bridge area proper.  Now Silvier was off along the canal while Top Hat checked the other side of the canal.  Both wrong and Fruit’n’Nut took the lead, calling all on.  Up through the trees went we, all the way to the top.  It levelled out a bit and had front-runners all over the place trying to find flour.  After a while the ‘On’ was called and all but Back Up and MR followed the trail down again, and a long way down it was.  Then, up they came again to join the top ridge runners who both were chuffed at their ability to save energy.  Through more leafy, hilly countryside until Centre of Attraction was castigated for rapidly descending the hill, arms outstretched, but failing to ‘Wheeee’ all the way down.  The first regroup was at the canal lock keeper’s cottage.  After a pleasant sunny pause it was along the canal for a few yards before turning off up the hill once more and a turn back towards the railway line.  At the bridge we turned again getting deeper into the trees and then back across the road where we were entertained by a piper practising where no one could hear him!  Then on to a familiar plateau.  Despite claiming not to recognise the area, Bidet now picked up the flour (not literally) and we descended once more.  Up and down, down and up we must have climbed every hill at least once.  Now the pack split with Bidet and MR not wanting to lose height and guessing the trail would eventually rise to join the Old Guildford Road; they kept straightish on and found the trail which they then followed faithfully all the way home.  The remainder, led by Silvier, soon came home.  Down downs were awarded to the ‘dippy’ hare (who got a refill because he was thirsty) for taking us up and down the dips, to Centre of Attraction and Mountain Rescue for adjust their footwear on the ay round, to Bidet for knowing all, and to Silvier and Hi Hat for being so changeable.  We then retired to the White Hart at Pirbright for resuscitation. All in all, an excellent experience.

On On

NOTES ON DH3 RUN 264 ON WEDNESDAY 7^th MAY 2008
FROM OUTRIDDEN COPSE (GR: 832510)

Hare:  Richard McAllister (Mountain Rescue)

Hounds:

Neil Warren (Armoured Farmer), Paul Armstrong (Back Up), Tony Case (Fruit’n’Nut), Chris Farmer (Bidet), Tony Soane (Sony Tone), Alan Jewell (Easy Rider), Sarah Nagel (Petal), Ian Angell (Hippo), Ron Peasley (Hi Hat), Brian Langford (Cyclone), Kim Dyos (Little Prick), Terry Newland (Rainbow Man), Cath Bradshaw (Twin Peaks), Derek Gray (Prime8), Rachel Parkinson (Park‘n’Ride), Les Salmon (Ever Ready), Clare Silman (One Way Only), Rick Rawcliffe (Giant Haystack) and Martin Woods (Top Secret).

Glorious weather – we thought it may get too hot but the pack was so lethargic that sweating was hardly an option. However, the start was delayed because we were suspicious of a car with three men who appeared to waiting for us to depart.  Not wanting to have our cars rifled, Bidet (our ex-policeman) was left to look after the situation.  So, the rest of us set off going north from the car park with Park‘n’Ride well to the fore; but, not for long for the trail slipped sideways through the remnants of local shig and that left the front runners way behind while Sony Tone now took the lead.  At the ‘T’ junction came the first real indication of pack lethargy. Sony was still out front and, unknown to him on the right trail.  Eventually Ever Ready wandered off in the wrong direction only to be called back to join the rest of the pack who were all now short cutting to join our leader.  More lethargy on display, but now Sony was on the wrong side of the track to see the start of the trail. Bidet had by now ‘seen off’ the watchers and rejoined the pack, complaining that he was now too old to be able to give the pack a five minute start, but he was still able to lead the pack towards the middle of a large puddle. Most quickly found the dry route but were then completely flummoxed by the hare’s devious trail.  A hint led to Fruit ‘n’ Nut finding the correct way into the trees over some rotting undergrowth and into some close country.  In file we proceeded through the trees and up to the top of the rise where we had the first re-group and enjoyed a pause in glorious sunshine. Once re-grouped, Fruit ‘n’ Nut led a small party in the wrong direction while Park‘n’Ride got it right, again. 

The first significant downhill brought a ‘Wheeee’ out of Little Prick.  Down we went, across a main track, down again to a conjunction of paths and it was Bidet who led the pack into another shiggy bit only to find a back back.  So this gave Park‘n’Ride the opportunity once more to get the pack going the right way through some pleasant woodland and on to the Bourley Road.  On the other side and up the slope was the second re-group.  Now there was some confusion for as the pack searched, Fruit ‘n’ Nut looked as though he had found the trail but called for a false trail.  It seems the flour had been re-arranged but the hare was there to put it right.  By now, Prime8 and Hi Hat seemed to be vying for the rear runner award while Bidet and Park ‘n’ Ride were showing off at the front.  Hippo now came into his own and found the trail after a back back had been declared.  Up through the trees we went, for quite a while. Armoured Farmer eventually picked up the trail and we just kept going up.  Then it was, inevitably, down again.  At the bottom, some of the pack surveyed the small track going up through the trees –“It can’t be up there!” declared some.  But it was.

For a while there was a lot of puffing but then it was a pleasant jog along a level path with Sony about to lead all astray.  Again, Hippo was there to call back the errant front-runners and hidden blobs of flour were once more displayed after the removal of deceptive devices.  The trail was now clear for a while but the next check caused some delay until Little Prick and Petal were persuaded to try going straight up the hill through thick undergrowth.  To their surprise, the path opened up and there was the flour trail once more.  Up and over the hill, and down to the lakes.  Ever Ready was on again and soon the pack was crossing over the divide between two lakes.  Armoured Farmer blamed Park‘n’Ride for leading him astray by going too far up the next rise without any flour.  However, they both managed to find their way back to the main trail, while it was Ever Ready who now misled the significant remnants of the pack all the way to the top of the hill and way off into unknown…  Meanwhile, the short cutters and lost souls had found their way home and some time later the exhausted remnants returned.

So, after the regular down down for the Hare, our two virgins (Giant Haystack and Top Secret) received theirs, as did Park‘n’Ride and Armoured Farmer for disillusionment, and Prime8 and Ever Ready who had to try harder.  The Tweseldown cared for our post run refreshment and gave us the venue for entertainment.  And jolly it was, too…

ON,ON

NOTES ON DH3 RUN 263 ON WEDNESDAY 23rd APRIL 2008
FROM FORESTERS PUB (GR: 825528)

Hare:  Neil Warren (Armoured Farmer) and Paul Armstrong (Back Up)

Hounds:

Tony Case (Fruit’n’Nut), Chris Farmer (Bidet), Tony Soane (Sony Tone), Richard McAllister (Mountain Rescue), Alan Jewell (Easy Rider), Sarah Nagel (Petal), Steve Nagel (Silvier Fox), Ian Angell (Hippo), Ron Peasley (Hi Hat), Brian Langford (Cyclone), Paul Gallagher (Spring Lamb) Vance Allen (Silver Jumper), Kim Dyos (Little Prick) and Terry Newland (Rainbow Man).

The weather couldn’t have been better.  We set off, only a little late, in a northerly direction having been warned of a couple of road crossings and three regroups.  Spring Lamb, our Hash virgin, was briefed on what to do on the way and he soon cottoned on, as did his dog.  However, the dog never did suss crossing a cattle grid and got stuck every time.  The trail tended to be a little muddy, but nothing too serious.  There was an element of idleness, noted by Sony Tone, who at one stage asked if we were actually supposed to be running.  So, reluctant runners jogged off and soon caught idling Fruit’n’Nut escorting Cyclone – both claimed they were waiting for the rest to catch up.  Meanwhile, Silvier and Silver Jumper were way ahead.  The trail followed various tracks through the woods with most just enjoying the start of spring and a very pleasant St George’s Day.  Soon, after a long loop, we were back at the road that we had to cross to get over into the Tweseldown area.  Once more, Silvier was out in front but it was Bidet who used his lungs pour encourage les autres.  Into the area we progressed and just as we were mounting a rise, Bidet found himself explaining to some youngsters that we were following a flour trail and not on a coke sniffing expedition.  At the top of the rise some flowering narcissi were spotted, leading to a query about how on earth they got there.  ‘Marking the spot of a fallen Hasher’ was one response that led to Rainbow man’s retort “Hashes to hashes, dust to dust…”  Soon, Little Prick marked her return after a lengthy absence by wheeing down the other side of the hill and others took up wheeing, as well.  By now those still on the top of the hill could see that the far distant Silvier was on the correct trail so we all set off to follow him.  After a while, he lost the lead because he had too many checks to investigate.  However, he was not far from the next regroup and he was quickly joined by one and all.  Mountain Rescue was now allowed to find the trail going downhill and was allowed to go off in the wrong direction. The trail turned on itself and went back up the hill, only to go down again to the spot from where MR had just returned.  Back across the road and it was Bidet to the fore until Silvier caught him.   And Spring Lamb rescued his dog for one last time.  A very pleasant run enjoyed by all.  Down Downs went to the Hares for their grand efforts, to Silver Jumper and Silvier Fox for being shining leaders, to Spring Lamb on losing his virginity, to ‘the lumpy ones’ Petal and Little Prick, to Hippo and Bidet for being authoritarians (the latter managed to drink through his mouth and eject much of the beer out through his nasal orifices creating explosive mirth from the pack) and to Cyclone for returning from so long overseas and Mountain Rescue for completing the London Marathon.  It was then on to the Tweseldown for a pleasant and very well deserved spot of refreshment.

Be warned that Deepcut is thinking of the occasional Sunday run during the summer and in a non-running week. Keep an eye out for progress on the proposition on our website.

On On.

NOTES ON DH3 RUN 262 ON WEDNESDAY 9th APRIL 2008
FROM NORRIS BRIDGE (GR: 833536)

Hare:  Tony Case (Fruit’n’Nut)

Hounds:

Chris Farmer (Bidet), Tony Soane (Sony Tone), Richard McAllister (Mountain Rescue), Alan Jewell (Easy Rider), Sarah Nagel (Petal), Derrick Gray (Pime8), Ian Angell (Hippo), Neil Warren (Armoured Farmer), Rachel Parkinson (Park’n’Ride), Ron Peasley (Hi Hat), Andy Rogers (Sky Hi), Paul Armstrong (Back Up), Neil Digby (Mary), Sally Duncan (Ali Kat), Martin Potter (Goofie) and Brian Langford (Cyclone).

It all started well; good weather, hounds right place, right time-ish, hare’s brief was brief (standard signs, three regroups and a finish suited to the marathon runner) and we were off over the main road westwards through heavy traffic.  Goofie searched in the wrong direction, Park ‘n’ Ride started well but lost confidence and Mary shot off with misguided confidence up the wrong path.  Over the rise and down the other side, Mountain Rescue stumbled across the trail leading off through the trees but Mary soon overtook to lead us astray.  Brought back to heel, the pack followed the flour once again only to find Hippo standing on the first regroup (and he denied having taken the direct route over the hill and swore that he had cut back to join the pack only to come across the trail leading to his regroup).  So we regrouped.  It was Hippo again who made the right decision and the rest followed down the main path towards the Foresters.  A check caused Sony Tone to deflect to the right but his checking was in vain. The trail now led down to the car park below the Foresters and crossed the road.  Sadly, there were few who witnessed the squeals of Park ‘n’ Ride as she gave warning of the deep shig she was in.  Into the racecourse through the gate (actually, Ali Kat avoided the shig at the gate by climbing over the gate, an example copied with great inelegance by those who followed).  Off through the racecourse and, of course, up the only real hill in the area.  At this point it seemed only your scribe realised that going up that hill only meant going down the other side and how much easier it was just to run around the bottom.  Then there was confusion; Mary and Sky Hi were convinced they knew what they were doing…  Anyway, to cut an unnecessarily long story short, all parties ended up within view of each other, each calling a regroup and only 400 yards apart.  The majority won and we regrouped.  Setting off it was very soon that we were back-tracked to where Hippo had been insisting that we should just go to the other regroup.  So, we did. And Hippo was right.  So now we were on the fourth of the three regroups and the hare had to admit that there may be five, or six or maybe seven… The trail now took us to regroup five.  Pleasant enough surroundings with Sky Hi leading us on when we heard a new Hash Call from Park ‘n’ Ride – “Oh. On ‘ere then” as she was surprised by the appearance of flour at her feet.  The trail now led us towards the Pondtail bridge where Mary, eager as ever, took us down under the bridge to the canal path.  From here, it was a long straight ‘marathon’ run for home.  Down downs were awarded to the Hare as ever, to Park ‘n’ Ride for appearing at two consecutive Hashes, to Cyclone for coming back from the dead (Bidet’s phrase) and making his first appearance for many a month, to Ali Kat for representing the GM and to Prime8 for misguiding.  Mary got his for being too bloody keen and Hi Hat for turning up with his top hat. Just when we thought it was all over Mountain Rescue got one for representing Deepcut in the upcoming London Marathon.  The On Inn was at the Tweseldown where we were too early for chips.  On, on ‘til next time…

NOTES ON DH3 RUN 261 ON WEDNESDAY 26 MARCH 2008
FROM OFFICERS MESS CAR PARK (GR: 912588)

Hare:  Flash Gordon (Cruise Control).

Hounds:

Chris Farmer (Bidet), Tony Soane (Sony Tone), Richard McAllister (Mountain Rescue), Alan Jewell (Easy Rider), Sue Figgis (Centre of Attraction), Sarah Nagel (Petal), Steve Nagel (Sylvier), Tony Case (Fruit’n’Nut), Alex Duncan (Flying Storker), Paul Duncan (Old Grouser), Derrick Gray (Prime8), Ian Angell (Hippo), Neil Warren (Armoured Farmer), Rachel Parkinson (Park’n’Ride), Ron Peasley (Hi Hat), Andy Rogers (Sky Hi), Steve Wheeler (Yorkie), Paul Armstrong (Back Up) and Abby Peacock (Grand Dame).

Oh! What a boring start is was for some.  Well, most in fact.  It was a run around an empty field  - a very big empty field.  But then things changed and Silvier led us off through the ‘new’ housing development and across the main road into the trees.  Grand Dame’s lead (for Silvier had now gone astray) was short lived by a back back and He Who Hates the Front found himself just where he hated to be.  But, not for long as Silvier once more found himself where he likes to be and the rest followed.  It was now that we found out just how hilly the area really is.  Up and down we continued with Silvier leading most of the time but the occasional change with Sky Hi and even Mountain Rescue who managed to short cut his way to the fore, closely followed by Yorkie who was making a welcome return.  A regroup eventually got the pack back together and it was here that Old Grouser’s dog, Dennis, was rebuked for chasing after a squirrel instead of the Hare.  Once Fruit’n’Nut with Prime8 managed to catch up, checkers were out every which way but it was Mountain Rescue, again where he hated to be who found the true trail without even taking a short cut.  It was not long before Silvier once again overtook.  More great undulations and the trail went up and up.  Silvier was there with Mountain Rescue not far behind and then there was no flour.  Not a drop.  Absolutely zilch.  While checking around at the top the main pack had obviously found the trail, Silvier had descended with them, Sky Hi and Park’n’Ride had gone down to join them leaving your scribe alone, out of earshot and reluctant to lose hard-gained height.  It got quite lonely and was a long way down to the bottom.  But that is where the regroup was judging from the sound of Hippo’s horn.  Sooo…all the way down to a waiting, unsympathetic, jeering pack went lonesome only to find that the trail was only 20 yards from where he had been at the top of the hill.  Up we all went.  Then down a bit and along.  From the ridge top (well, nearly the top) it was possible to see Grand Dame at the fore and well on trail with Flying Storker not far behind.  The former was taken by surprise when the SCBs burst out of the undergrowth in front of her but soon we were all stopped by another regroup.  Our peace was disrupted by a flying, downhill cyclist who had difficulty braking his iron steed on slippery ground as he approached a ford back by the golf course.  Park’n’Ride was encouraged to check out further than she really wanted to go but was called back by Silvier who now had a good start on the continuing trail.  Flash now earned his name as he had controlled the pack throughout the run and now decided we’d had enough.  So he modified the trail and took us straight home – a good move as we had been out for well over the hour and there was a thirst in most throats.  Down downs went to the Hare in recognition of his grand success, to Old Grouser and Mountain Rescue for being the long distance runners, Abby who picked up her tag (Grand Dame) and to Park’n’Ride and Bidet for being lost and found (as Field Marshal, Bidet kept losing count of the Hashers).  The On Inn was the Pine Ridge Golf Club where once again we had excellent ale a good price and lashings of chips (rated at 8.6) and very good company.

On On On and On again ‘til next time

NOTES ON DH3 RUN 260 ON WEDNESDAY 12 MARCH 2008
FROM FARNHAM GOLF COURSE CAR PARK (GR: 837476)

Hares:  Chris Farmer (Bidet) and Martin Potter (Goofy).

Hounds:

Tony Soane (Sony Tone), Les Salmon (Ever Ready), Richard McAllister (Mountain Rescue), Alan Jewell (Easy Rider), Sue Figgis (Centre of Attraction), Sarah Nagel (Petal), Steve Nagel (Sylvier), Kim Dyos (Little Prick), Tony Case (Fruit’n’Nut), Alex Duncan (Flying Storker), Sally Duncan (Ali Cat), Paul Duncan (Old Grouser), Vance Allen (Silver Jumper), Derrick Gray (Prime8) and Clare Silman (Shiggy Skipper).

NOTES ON DH3 RUN 259 ON WEDNESDAY 27 FEBRUARY 2008
FROM FLEET POND LOWER CAR PARK (GR: 826554)

Hare:  Graham Smith (Ubique)

Hounds:

Tony Soane (Sony Tone), Les Salmon (Ever Ready), Richard McAllister (Mountain Rescue), Alan Jewell (Easy Rider), Sue Figgis (Centre of Attraction), Sarah Nagel (Petal), Ron Peasley (Hi Hat), Ian Angell (Hippo) and Kim Dyos (Little Prick).

So few of us for such a delightful setting with great climatic conditions.  We arrived at the car park to find a police presence and a number of pot-smoking youths being interviewed.   The copper was acquainted with Ever Ready who we believed had been recognised from his photographs.  I digress…the nine of us set off from the front of the police car and went through some pretty rough, unkempt brambles and the like only to find we were already lost, just 50 yards from the cars.  Sadly for him, Mountain Rescue found himself on trail and therefore at the front, a position he does not appreciate.  Fortune was with him for it was not long before Sony Tone overtook and ran blindly off along the road.  It was a while before anyone really appreciated that there was a certain lack of flour in the area.  The hare was spotted lurking some distant way back so the more astute hounds cut cross-country to the approximate area of said hare’s location only to find that Centre of Attraction had also turned up and was beside the hare – the pack was now ten strong!  He who hates leading found himself at the front again, with Centre of Attraction branching off to check at a split in the path.  She was right and the other fellow a bit psst off again.  And so it seemed to go on.  Sony Tone, who should have been called ‘Never Right’ or ‘Always Wrong’ trying to lead us astray and Ever Ready or Hippo blowing his trumpet leading the way until we turned a corner only to find Centre of Attraction there before us – again.  Second guessing the trail was not productive for most of us as the Hare criss-crossed and turned to create confusion.  Easy Rider was noted as getting it right on a number of occasions.  At a regroup, we were confronted by an aged couple being led by a Great Dane that seemed intent on eating Centre of Attraction’s little dog.  Petal it was who appreciated that the men left the women to try to control the Great Dane, an observation which attracted little sympathy from the majority (the men).  Having been warned that the trail was ‘a bit urban’ we were not surprised to find ourselves amongst the houses but it was not to be for too long.  Hippo led us in the right direction, bringing the majority back from whence they had strayed following you-know-who.  By now, MR and you-know-who had given up trying to lead so followed along, not realising they had fallen quite so far behind; for at the next major junction there was neither sight nor sound of the pack.  Their cries were unheeded.  It was a lucky guess that brought them back to the rest and the trail now went through some pleasant wooded areas in the general direction of home.  A couple of stops in the sunshine and the car park was all but there before us.  In the absence of the RA the pack retired to the Heron on the Pond for their refreshment – a very pleasant setting on the lake side but with a zero rating for the chips which they would not sell to us without a meal.  One steak and nine portions of chips was not acceptable…Then the sun dropped below the trees and with it, the temperature.  It was time to go home.

NOTES ON DH3 RUN 258 ON WEDNESDAY 13 FEBRUARY 2008
FROM RLC MUSEUM (GR: 906577)

Hare:  Pip Barnes (Reveille)

Hounds:

Tony Soane (Sony Tone), Derrick Gray (Prime8), Les Salmon (Ever Ready), Tony Case (Fruit’n’Nut), Richard McAllister (Mountain Rescue), Alan Jewell (Easy Rider), Neil Warren (Armoured Farmer), Kevin Bennett (Lap Dog), Chris Farmer (Bidet), Andy Rogers (Sky Hi), Rachel Parkinson (Park’n’Ride), Kath Bradshaw (Twin Peaks), Sue Figgis (Centre of Attraction), Sarah Nagel (Petal), Steve Nagel (Silvier Fox), Ron Peasley (Hi Hat), Martin Potter (Goofie), Graham Smith (Ubique), Taff Lyndon (Hot Pacer).

The weather couldn’t have been better.  The hare was quite good, too.  His trail was good and he made excellent use of the area.  Pity is was his first lay, and his last with us.  So we all set off across the road from the car park into the ‘more interesting’ part of the area.  Silvier was way up front and for a change we could occasionally hear his cries and he remained, by and large, on the true trail.  The hinterland was surprisingly hilly.  We were told it was to be through woods and that it would be interesting.  The front group was mainly he already named, Goofie and the woolly-hatted Sky Hi with Park’n’Ride making the occasional attempt at keeping up.  Then there were the layabouts and SCBs who formed the main body.  Bidet passed comment about going uphill and probably having to go down the other side, perhaps not conscious of the fact that when going up, reaching the top, there is only one direction in which to go.  So, he was right and we all went down again.  It was apparent that the pace was getting too fast for the majority so the message was shouted to the front that we needed a regroup.  The message was ignored as the front-runners ran on. And on.  Then came the first formal regroup and this time they did stop.  By now Ever Ready was wheezing well and Prime8 had disappeared.  Hi Hat was busy taking short cuts and Ubique was paying the penalty for months of idleness in the USA. Lap Dog’s dogs were now tiring and not doing such a good job of towing master up the more difficult bits but he did disappear on occasion to investigate potential trails.  The trail certainly turned out to be very hilly and there were some long stretches of real running.  Prime8 didn’t know much about this, of course, as he was too busy checking out the short cuts (but he got his come-uppance when he realised he didn’t know where he was).  His remains were later found wandering through the trees long after the down-downs and the more sensible had retired to the bar having not missed him.  So while Prime8 wandered, the rest of us had formed the circle and the RA started by greeting the North Hants Hashers, forgetting that it was a Wednesday and we are the Deepcut Hash.  Down-downs went to the ‘Splendid’ Hare for his efforts, to Ron Peasley who was named Hi Hat for wearing a Welsh cap and then referred to as Top Hat, and to Taff Lyndon who was a virgin and named Hot Pace having picked up criticism for racing.  Petal picked up a Hashy Birthday for another 21^st while the potential Olympians in the forms of Silvier, the front-runner, Park’n’Ride for returning after a four month pause, and Centre of Attraction who arrived late but stumbled into the pack after wandering around a bit.  Finally, Ski Hi got one for wearing his woolly hat all the way round.  The On Inn was the golf club once again, for beer, chips and chips with…  Then there was the sight of Bidet celebrating his receipt of dues from Armoured Farmer…

NOTES ON DH3 RUN 257 ON WEDNESDAY 30 JANUARY 2008
FROM LIGHTWATER COUNTRY PARK (GR: 902618)

Hare:  Tony Soane (Sony Tone)

Hounds:

Derrick Gray (Prime8), Les Salmon (Ever Ready), Tony Case (Fruit’n’Nut), Richard McAllister (Mountain Rescue), Alan Jewell (Easy Rider), Kim Dyos (Little Prick), Paul Duncan (Old Grouser), Pip Barnes (Reveille), Neil Warren (Armoured Farmer), Vance Allen (Silver Jumper), Kath Bennett (Wood Lark), Kevin Bennett (Lap Dog), Maria Cinnamon (Milk Shake), Chris Farmer (Bidet), Jannine Holloway (Skimming-On), Laura Marsh (Quick Pick), Andy Rogers (Sky Hi).

The sky was blue and the sun was shining.  “…for a brief on an interesting trail.”  Words of invitation from the RA to the Hare at the start. “A boring run…” the response from the Hare, and that was the first of his fibs.  The next was that it would take only 55 minutes to run the course.  So, having been pointed in the right direction, Fruit’n’Nut led the pack into the park, running parallel to the main road.  Some short-lived confusion and we were out running beside the main road, over the motorway and left back into woodland.  By now Silver Jumper was in the lead and from here on the front-runner switched between Silver Jumper and Bidet until Sky Hi took over.  The going was good with not too much shig and paths easy to run along.  The uphill bit went on for a while until the inevitable descent, which brought Little Prick ‘wheeing’ downwards and at speed with little control.  On a bit further to a second regroup and already Reveille and Silver Jumper were looking down the hillside for signs of the trail.  Their observation was rewarded and soon we were off down ther slope only to have to go up, repeatedly up and up again.  Then it all levelled out and there was a pleasant run along the ridge to an observation point and the third regroup where we all received advice from Old Grouser.  It was Quick Pick who encouraged us all to move on when the advice was announced – “If you are ever attacked at a circus by the clowns, always go for the juggler!”  Well, that was enough to move anyone on.  Once more Sky Hi was at the front leading us down the hill, but then it was a very vocal Bidet who took up the front slot.  At the footbridge over the M3 there was another regroup so we bunched and decided that the way forward was probably back through the tunnel and not over the bridge.  While waiting, Mountain Rescue volunteered to check out the bridge just in case it was a double-bluff and Bidet gave support in the hopes that he could pass any information back above the constant roar of the traffic.  Over the bridge, there was a problem; lots of lumps of white wool which had assumed the size, style and look flour blobs – so MR had to continue to check for a hundred yards to make sure there was no flour hiding amongst the rubbish.  On returning, he was somewhat taken aback to find the whole pack had followed over the bridge.  No wonder the Hare was grinning like the proverbial Cheshire Cat!  The run to the tunnel was straightforward and at the last regroup there was a certain chuntering about 55 minutes… Then we were all back, in a circle with down downs awarded to: the caring Hare, Quick Pick and Ever Ready who were invited to drink from their new running shoes, to Old Grouser who actually turned up this week instead of his better half, and to Armoured Farmer who now had turned up twice in a row.  Wood Lark and Lap Dog got them for being intelligent runners while Sky Hi got his for being a puddle jumper.  At the Pine Ridge Golf Club there was much jollity, good company, a joke or two and lots of excellent chips…

On On!

NOTES ON DH3 RUN 256 ON WEDNESDAY 16 JANUARY 2008
FROM NORRIS BRIDGE (GR: 833536)

Hares:  Derrick Gray (Prime8), Les Salmon (Ever Ready)

Hounds:

Sarah Nagel (Petal), Tony Case (Fruit’n’Nut), Tony Soane (Sony Tone), Richard McAllister (Mountain Rescue), Alan Jewell (Easy Rider), Kim Dyos (Little Prick), Sally Duncan (Ali Kat), Pip Barnes (Reveille), Terry Newland (Rainbow Man) and Neil Warren (Armoured Farmer).

Numbers were down this week but then in days of yore 12 would have been a good attendance.  Lots of shiggy was the first warning and after all the recent rain we could believe that.  A certain amount of cow poop was the second warning.  That was the first fib – we didn’t see any and there was no unpleasant aroma on our return. Should take about an hour was the second lie and then we were off, not very quickly because there was some confusion.  However, soon the trail was picked up and we were well on our way.  After paralleling the canal for a bit, we swung left into a well-forested area which had obviously not been covered by footfall for quite some time.  A deep covering of very soggy leaves made progress soft and unsure.  Then there were the sultry tones of Fruit’n’Nut advising us to watch the steaks.  Barbeque? Cookout? Picnic?  But no, what he should have called was ‘Watch the stakes’.  There was just no accounting for the calls by some.  Then we followed the airfield perimeter for a while until plunging down to the passageway under the road and out into the wilds of Pyestock. Now here’s the sad bit.  Your scribe went off on a check that had no apparent end. By the time he’d checked several pathways, turned about and checked several more, he was well out of earshot of the pack.  To make matters worse, he found the trail but the pack were not kicking out the circle at the false trails so each time there was a check he had to check each path (unless he struck lucky, which he didn’t).  So, what happened to the pack will remain unrecorded for a while until he eventually caught up and found out why they had not been kicking out the circles – they hadn’t found them and were running blind!  Anyway, once rejoined, the pack as a whole was now off by Fleet Pond enjoying themselves running through the trees. It was now very apparent that there was no way we were going to be back within the hour so the hares decided to cut out a bit of the trail – just as well as the proposed original trail went through deep shig.  As it was we just went through shallow shig having crossed over a raging torrent in the main drainage ditch beside the path.  We soon found ourselves alongside the canal once more and it was a straightforward run home.  Down Downs were awarded to the Hares as ever, to Ali Kat for following the short alleys between trails, to Mountain Rescue for getting so far behind the pack and producing a load of bullshig, and to Little Prick and Reveille for being so adventurous on the trail.  The On Inn was the Tweseldown where we all enjoyed good company and not a bad jug or two of ale.  Sony Tone was saddened by being within 20 minutes of chip production time but had to leave without a nibble.

For all absentees:

DO TRY AND MAKE IT TO LIGHWATER NEXT TIME!!

NOTES ON DH3 RUN 255 ON WEDNESDAY 02 JANUARY  2008
FROM STARVE ACRE (GR: 845595)

Hares:  Sarah Nagel (Petal) and Steve Nagel (Silvier Fox).

Hounds:

Tony Case (Fruit’n’Nut), Kath Bradshaw (Twin Peaks), Tony Soane (Sony Tone), Richard McAllister (Mountain Rescue), Alan Jewell (Easy Rider), Paul Duncan (Old Grouser), Alex Duncan (Flying Storker), Robyn Duncan (A Tipple), Chris Noice (NNY), Kim Dyos (Little Prick), James Roberts (No Entry), Libby Ralph (Old Thumper),‘Flash’ Gordon (NNY), Karen Gordon (Mrs Flash), Lizzie Gordon (NNY), Thomas Gordon (NNY), Mike Robertson (NNY), Nigel Smellie (NNY), Richard Castell (NNY), Andy Nixon (NNY), Simon Nixon (NNY)

The first seven to arrive, including the Hares, were all North Hants Hashers.  Not known for their promptness the question arose: ‘Oh. Is it going to be an NH4 run?’  But, no, there were more cars in the system that disgorged a huge quantity of Hounds from Deepcut, most of them new to some of us.  But what a grand group they were.  And how they enjoyed the run. And how lost they all got right at the start.  It started badly for No Entry when he found. Little Prick hadn’t included his shoes with her kit so he had to go back home to get them.  Eventually the pack worked out where to go and things started to look up.  Out of the trees, into a clearing and further confusion with Hounds going far and wide while a certain newcomer in a ‘very senior appointment’ extolled the virtues of those little circles of flour of flour.  Those within earshot tended to agree, not because he is in a ‘very senior appointment’, but because they, too, were breathless – already and we’d hardly started.  There were so many Hounds around going in so many directions that it was difficult to keep track of who was doing what.  The younger ones were doing sterling work at the checks.  A Limp On (Olympian, in case you didn’t get it) was all over the place with A Tipple and Flying Storker also keenly dashing around with some success.  But it was Old thumper who first found the way. Shortly thereafter, at the first regroup, a well-shod No Entry came flying down the hill to join us.  Then Mrs Flash claimed to be enjoying herself as were her little sparks (actually, not so little – just offspring).  We were off again and just as things seemed to be working well, Little Prick played her party piece by “Wheeeing” down the hill.  Almost simultaneously, A Tipple also “Wheeed” past the pack.  At a significant upward rise, Flash took off and pounded up the slope. ‘Flash ye b’stad’(or somesuch) passed through my mind as he strode by. ‘Flash in the Pan’ was the next thought as he ran out of puff half way up; or perhaps not even half way up. The newcomers had certainly caught on but then it turned out that some of them had Hashed before.  It was a bit too cold to stand about at the checks and there were enough of us to make sure that the checks didn’t hold us up for too long.  Contentment, then.  There was some discussion about who would be first home and be the ‘winner’.  At this point it should be pointed out that all Hashers are winners and the first one at the On Inn has probably cheated (except that you can’t really cheat in Hashing).  Anyway, after 55 minutes we were all back where we started.  Not too tired, not too cold, in good spirits and awaiting the Down Downs that went to:  the ‘very best’ Hares, to Nigel Smellie and Mike Robertshaw as Established Hashers, to Old Thumper and Sony Tone (substituted for Twin Peaks who’d done a runner) as Those Responsible, to newcomers named in the circle A Tipple, Flying Storker and A Limp On and finally to No Entry (RA from NH4) as ‘The Other Guy’.  The party at the Crown and Cushion got off to a slow start because the beer barrels emptied at just the wrong time.  The short wait was worth it as great jollity spread throughout the assembled pack.  It all finished some time later with a hilarious episode of trying to persuade Fruit’n’Nut to modernise (can you imagine a modernised Fruit’n’Nut!) and get back on to the www and even get a mobile.  But then some of us enjoying wasting time…

HAPPY NEW YEAR TO ALL READERS

NOTES ON DH3 RUN 254 ON WEDNESDAY 19 DECEMBER 2007
FROM OLD DEAN COMMON (GR: 875623)

Hares:  Ian Lowers (City Slicker) and Tony Case (Fruit’n’Nut).

Hounds:

Cath Bradshaw (Twin Peaks), Tony Soane (Sony Tone), Richard McAllister (Mountain Rescue), Alan Jewell (Easy Rider), Sarah Nagel (Petal), Derek Gray (Primate), Chris Farmer (Bidet), Les Salmon (Ever Ready), Paul Duncan (Old Grouser), Sally Duncan(NNY), Vance Allen (Silver Jumper), Ian Angel (Hippo), Pip Barnes (Reveille) Kevin Bennett, (Lap Dog), Maria Cinnamon (Milk Shake), Kim Dyos (Little Prick), ‘Flash’ Gordon (NNY), Clare Silman (One Way Only), Laura Marsh (Quick Pick), Cora Rose (NNY), Richard Rawcliffe(NNY) and Mark Woodward (NNY).

Lots of virgins and newcomers, and some who hadn’t appeared for ages all meant that Fruit’n’Nut felt obliged to prattle on with his briefing – so prattle on he did, and on; and on, until Bidet and Mountain Rescue (who was ridiculously dressed) set off on their own only to find the On Inn right beside the start.  Was this to be the shortest of Hashes?  Sadly, not and the cry of on sent us all (well, nearly all) off on the wrong trail.  By now Fruit’n’Nut was trying to re-gather the unruly mob while City Slicker pretended it was nothing to do with him.  The chaos edged into the trees and over a couple of flowing drainage ditches before the first regroup back on the path from which we had just departed.  From here, ‘Flash’ almost lived up to his name as he shot of up the slope, while Hippo called us on from below (but we knew he was on the shortcut so didn’t join him).  Then more nonsense as the pack swirled around the wilderness looking for the trail – the obvious way had a back-back which we eventually ignored and rose to the top of the hill where considerable verbal abuse from Bidet (who had accompanied one of the hares) was received.  Easy Rider took up the trail that just led us back down the hill but in a slightly different direction.  Not for long did we run before the next back-back that surprise, surprise went back up the hill in yet another slightly different direction.  All the time we were making our way towards the line of pylons (some of us knew they went all the way to Dungeness (ha, ha – joke known to some from previous visit.  See Notes on Run 233 if you are interested)).  Another regroup before Hippo’s horn was heard and we started back for the higher ground.  But, before we got there we discovered a message in flour wishing us all a MERRY XMAS and it was here that there was a pause for Glüwein and Mince Pies.  Bidet was quick to observe that, once again, the pies had no brandy butter with them and the pies were cold (not as cold as we were!).  From here, the short-cutters just went straight up the hill to home, while the rest went a longer way round to the same location. Short but sweet and thanks to the two Tonys for the refreshments.  Down-downs went to the two hares for their trouble in laying a sporadically confusing trail, to Laura and Clare who picked up their names and to Hippo and Bidet for setting standards we can’t uphold.  By now it was darkening and cooling and much to our surprise and joy the RA declared the rest would be done at the bar.  We retreated to the Pineridge Golf Club bar where most of the pack reassembled to enjoy a large gathering, some jolly tales, and good ale.  The chef appeared from the kitchen just to make sure that the order was genuine before producing ten large bowls of chips.  These were really not bad and opinions varied between grades 7 and 8.  We’ll settle at 7½ 

A HAPPY CHRISTMAS TO ALL READERS

NOTES ON DH3 RUN 253 ON WEDNESDAY 5 DECEMBER 2007
FROM WELLINGTON MONUMENT (GR: 853511)

Hare:  Cath Bradshaw (Twin Peaks) and Tony Soane (Sony Tone).

Hounds:

Richard McAllister (Mountain Rescue), Alan Jewell (Easy Rider), Sarah Nagel (Petal), Steve Nagel (Silvier Fox), Derek Gray (Primate), Chris Farmer (Bidet), Les Salmon (Ever Ready), Graham Smith (Ubique), Paul Duncan (Old Grouser) and Tony Case (Fruit’n’Nut).

Once again, the weather turned in favour of the pack and the rain stopped just in time. “It’s not a long one and I don’t know this area,” was about all the briefing co-hare gave before we moved off across the playing field hoping to find the trail.  It was there but when we hit the first road, it wasn’t.  Checkers did their thing while loafers did theirs.  Bidet, in the wrong direction, was shouting encouraging shouts but it was Ubique who was on the right track but didn’t quite go far enough.  Mountain Rescue heard a comment from the co-hare and went just a bit further, only to be overtaken by Silvier who dashed down from the non-existent upper trail.  Then it seemed that the hares had purposely felled several trees and dug a couple of ditches to create great obstacles. At the first of the ditches, Bidet and Fruit’n’Nut were encouraged to assist Petal (who claimed to be ‘doing her lady thing’) across the deep and raging torrent (perhaps shallow trickle would be a better description) while Silvier pressed on to find the next bit of trail.  He was beaten to it by Easy Rider who took us down to the next junction and start of the real jungle.  Silvier’s enthusiasm had let him down again and the proper trail led down through the trees to the first and only regroup by the tunnel into Rushmore Stadium.  “What’s this?” was the query at the driver training area as though we had never been there before. Some of us had learnt that there were two hounds who should never be followed from a check; Silvier and Ubique.  However, they do have their uses because when they are both front-runners and you come to a triple junction, it is easy to know which way to go. It was not long before Silvier reclaimed the lead and we found ourselves going homewards.  The trail now had a loop that immediately allowed the tail-enders to shortcut to join Silvier, who by now had had enough at the front and wanted Bidet to take over.  From here it was a fairly straightforward run home to the down downs.  The co-hare got his for assisting in the laying of an entirely satisfactory and delightfully short trail.  Petal was next for she had portrayed a lady in distress while Mountain Rescue joined her as the ‘gentleman’ who assisted (all he actually did was to enlist the services of two others, but at least his immediate thirst was quenched).  The Grand Master was named; he was believed to be a devotee of a certain whisky, and as he was also believed to have passed adverse comments about our running on occasions, it seemed that ‘Old Grouser’ was apt.  Prime8 and Ubique were next; the former having been seen behind a totally inadequate tree ‘taking shelter’ and the latter being always on the wrong track, they were awarded for being Free & Easy. The Travel Inn was our home for the next 90 minutes while beer and wine was consumed with chips – the first batch was awarded 7.5 out of 10 while the second achieved 8 points (perhaps the fat was hotter).

We now look forward to the last of the Deepcut Hashes this year and hope to see many at the Christmas Hash where we are all expected to turn up in suitable ‘Seasonal Attire’ and enjoy a mince pie and mulled wine on the way.  Hope to see you all at Barossa amongst the married quarters at the back of Staff College (as it is still known by many).

On On!